Parents and Families - Government of New Brunswick

Parents and Families - Government of New Brunswick
Loving Care
Parents and Families
Loving Care: Parents and Families
Loving Care is a series of four books for parents of children from birth to age 3 developed by Nova Scotia’s Department of
Health and Wellness. As a public health resource, Loving Care focuses on information that will help young families to
protect, promote, or improve their health, and to prevent illness, injury or disability.
Three of the Loving Care books focus on babies and children at specific ages—Birth to 6 Months, 6 to 12 Months, and 1 to 3 Years.
This book—Loving Care: Parents and Families—offers information that will be useful to families whatever their child’s age. Parents and
Families is referred to throughout the other books.
Loving Care
Loving Care
Loving Care
Loving Care
Birth to 6 Months
6 to 12 Months
1 to 3 Years
Parents and Families
Writing: Janis Wood Catano, Easy-to-Read Writing
Design: Derek Sarty, GaynorSarty
Photography: Shirley Robb, Communications Nova Scotia; Peter Barss
When referring to this resource, please cite it as follows:
Parent Health Education Resource Working Group. Loving Care: Parents and Families.
[Halifax]: Nova Scotia Department of Health and Wellness, 2016; reprint [Fredericton]: Province of New Brunswick, 2017.
ISBN: 978-1-4605-0677-6 (print edition)
ISBN: 978-1-4605-0678-3 (PDF: English)
Crown Copyright, Province of Nova Scotia, 2008. Revised 2009, 2010, 2011, 2012, 2013, 2014, 2015, 2016.
All rights reserved. Adapted with permission by the Province of New Brunswick.
The information in this book is up-to-date as of the date of printing. This information is not a substitute for the advice of a health
professional.
Adapted and reprinted with written permission from the Province of Nova Scotia.
Loving Care
Parents and Families
Contents
Welcome
Introduction . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 2
How we decided what to put in these
books . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 2
Support for families . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 3
Health services. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 4
Respectful health care. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 6
Finding help when you need it. . . . . . . . . . . 6
Parents
Postpartum Care: Moms
Physical care after childbirth . . . . . . . . . 11
Baby blues and postpartum depression 11
Sex . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 13
Birth control . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 14
• Your periods . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 14
Postpartum Care: Partners
Your important role . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 17
Single Parenting
And baby makes two . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 21
When parents don’t live together . . . . . . 22
• When your child lives with you . . . . . . 23
• When your child lives with the other
parent . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 24
Parenting Together
Sharing parenting . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 27
Being a couple . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 28
Parent Care
Take care of yourself . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Immunizations . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Smoking . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Alcohol, drugs and gambling . . . . . . . . . .
Mental health . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
• Self-esteem . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
• Stress . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
• Depression . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
• Anger . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
31
33
34
37
38
38
39
40
41
Life is a journey of discovery that you and your baby are
taking together. No parent starts out having all the answers.
Families
Family Care
Eating for wellness . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 47
• How do you feel about food?. . . . . . . 47
• Family meals are a time for sharing. . 48
• What you can do to make eating for
wellness part of your children’s life. . 49
• Steps toward eating for wellness. . . . 49
Being active. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 51
Screen time. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 52
Marketing to children. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 53
Family safety. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 54
• Fire safety . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 54
• Car seats. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 55
• Sun safety. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 55
• Overheating. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 57
• Insect bites. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 57
• Safety around animals. . . . . . . . . . . . 59
• Family food safety. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 60
• Safe drinking water . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 62
• Lead poisoning . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 62
Life changes—loss and grief. . . . . . . . . . 63
• Helping small children handle grief. . 64
Sharing your values and traditions with
your children. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 65
Family violence. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 66
Brothers and Sisters
A little baby makes big changes. . . . . . . 69
Helping children get along together. . . . . 70
Sibling rivalry. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 71
Grandparents
Grandparents are learning too . . . . . . . . 75
Other Caregivers
Leaving your child with other
caregivers . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 78
Going back to work or school. . . . . . . . . 80
Finding quality childcare. . . . . . . . . . . . . 81
Thanks!
Thanks!. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 88
Resources
Provincial Services. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 94
Other Resources and Services. . . . . . . . 97
Eating Well with Canada’s Food Guide. . 102
Be Safe. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 108
Keep Kids Safe: A Parent’s Guide to
Car Seats. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 110
Canada’s Low Risk Alcohol
Drinking Guidelines. . . . . . . . . . . . . . 134
Introduction......................................................2
How we decided what to put in these books..........2
Support for families...........................................3
Health services..................................................4
Respectful health care........................................6
Finding help when you need it.............................6
Welcome
Welcome
Introduction
A new baby creates other new lives—a new
mother, a new father, new sisters and brothers,
new grandparents. All of you will be getting used
to new roles and new ways of looking at
yourselves and each other.
The birth of a baby changes individuals or
couples into a family. It takes time, patience,
and love for a new family to take shape and
settle into a new life together.
children and grandparents welcome their new
family member. We hope that it will help you to
make your own decisions about what’s best for
you and your family.
Take care of yourself! Your baby, your family,
and all of your relationships depend on your
health and well-being.
Added info...
As you give loving care to your new baby, don’t
forget to save a little for yourself and the rest of
your family.
We’ve written Loving Care for the parents of
healthy, full-term babies.
This book offers information to help parents meet
their own physical, mental, and emotional needs.
It also gives some information on helping
If your baby is premature or has health
problems or special needs, you can get the
specific information you need from your health
care providers.
How we decided what to put in these books
There’s so much that parents want to know! We
couldn’t include it all. When we wrote this series
of books, we had to decide what to put in and
what to leave out.
•
National and provincial government
policies, strategies, and key messages
•
We chose the information we used based on:
Interviews with parents from Family
Resource Centres across the province
•
•
Best practices—ways of doing things that we’ve learned work well
•
Research—results of studies into how to
promote the health of infants and young
children and help them to grow and develop
2
Input from experts in a variety of
disciplines, including: child health and
development, culturally specific practices,
family care, mental health, and many other
fields
Welcome
Some of what you read here may sound
different from what you heard growing up.
It may be different from what your parents
did when they were raising you.
Support for families
It’s normal for parents to want to talk to someone
about their baby and their feelings.
We all need the help and support of the people
around us. These are called our “social support
networks.”
Your social support network is made up of the
people that you can depend on in good times and
bad. It can include:
Family and friends
To learn about programs and supports in
your community:
•
Check bulletin boards, newspapers, and
libraries.
•
Ask your public health nurse, outreach
worker, home visitor, or other parents.
Elders
Other parents
Added info...
Community leaders
Spiritual and faith-based counselors
Many parents find that other parents are one of
their best sources of support. You can connect
with other parents through Family Resource
Centres (contact information, page 98), play
groups, playgrounds, coffee shops, malls,
libraries (contact information, page 99),
parks, and other places where parents meet
one another. You may feel shy about talking to
someone you don’t know, but try it. Other
parents are probably as eager to talk as you are.
Welcome
Besides being a good place to meet
other parents, Family Resource
Centres offer many different programs
for parents and kids. These include
parent education, family counseling
and support, children’s programs,
literacy programs, health and nutrition
programs, and employment support.
Family Resource Centres welcome all
members of the community.
Support for families
•
•
•
•
•
In most communities, there also are
programs and support for parents. These
are often free of charge and all parents are
welcome.
How we decided what to put in these books
Everything in these books is here to help
you give your baby the best possible start
in life.
Introduction
There are things you won’t find in these books.
For example, we don’t give you detailed
directions for how to do things like give a bath
or change a diaper. These are things we know
you’ll figure out on your own. We’ve tried to
focus on information that will help you
understand your baby so you can respond to her
needs and help her grow and develop.
3
Health services
If you need more help than informal supports can
offer, there are many professionals you can turn
to.
Public Health Services
Public Health works with communities, families
and individuals. Its goal is to prevent illness, to
protect and promote health, and to help all New
Brunswickers achieve wellbeing.
Public Health has many professionals
working across the province, in Regional
Health Authorities, and in communities. The
professionals you are most likely to have contact
with include:
•
•
Public health nurses
Public health dietitians
Primary health care
You are receiving primary health care when you
visit a doctor or nurse practitioner, consult with a
pharmacist, see a midwife or go to a class led by
a dietitian at the library.
The word “primary” means first. You receive
primary health care from a health care
professional who is usually your first contact with
the health care system. If you need it, a primary
care provider can refer you to specialists and
other health services.
4
You can receive primary health care services
from many different kinds of health care
providers in many different settings. Primary
health care professionals can include:
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
Dentists
Dental hygienists
Doctors
Nurses
Nurse practitioners
Pharmacists
Registered dietitians
Registered social workers
Tele-Care 811
Tele-Care 811 answers non-emergency
health questions. By dialing 811, you can get
information about a health issue or find out if you
or your child should see a health care provider.
If you are deaf or have hearing loss you can use
this service by dialing 1-866-213-7920 (TTY).
Tele-Care 811 can provide services in English
and French.
Welcome
Health services
Added info...
New Brunswick has a Prescription Drug Program to help with the cost of prescription drugs for
children with special needs.
Some families are also eligible for the New Brunswick Prescription Drug Program for low-income
children (contact information for both programs, pages 96)
Welcome
5
Respectful health care
There are many different kinds of health services
that you may seek out—for example, mental
health services, addiction services, family
doctors, or clinics.
You are entitled to health care that responds to
your individual needs, does not judge you, and
allows you to feel safe and respected.
Talk to your health care provider about what you
want and need for yourself and your baby. Help
your health care provider to offer care that
respects your race, culture, religion, sexual
orientation and ability.
Finding help when you need it
If something about your baby doesn’t seem right
to you, trust your instinct.
You know your baby better than anyone else.
•
If you’re worried, look for help from health
services in your community.
There are many people who can help. Keep
trying until you find the help you and your baby
need. It may take time, effort, and many phone
calls.
When looking for help:
•
6
Think about the problem. The more clearly
you can describe the problem and the kind of
help you need, the better chance you’ll have
of finding it.
Welcome
Start with people and organizations you
know. Ask for suggestions from other
parents, people in your support network,
your health care povider, public health nurse,
or social worker—anyone you can think of.
Organizations like a Family Resource Centre,
church, friendship centre, or community
centre may also have good ideas.
Keep a list of everyone you talk to. Write
down the names and numbers of everyone
you call and what they say. Use a scribbler or
a notebook so you won’t lose your list.
•
Ask for suggestions from the people you
contact. If the person you call can’t help, ask
them to suggest other places to try.
•
Look for support if you have issues that
make it harder to get the information or
care you need.
• If you have problems understanding English or French, ask for a translator. Many hospitals and clinics offer this
service.
• If you come from a different culture, • If you don’t read well, ask the health
Consider taking someone you trust with you to appointments if you are concerned that you might not understand everything that’s going on.
ask how you can get a cultural health interpreter at hospitals and clinics.
care provider to explain any printed
information or directions to you. Or ask for material that’s easier to read. It’s okay to say, “I don’t understand this.”
Added info...
There are no stupid questions!
If you are concerned about your child,
don’t be afraid to ask questions. You
have a right to information about your
child’s health.
You have a right to ask questions of
anyone who has a role in your child’s
care.
Keep asking questions until you get an
answer that you understand.
You can never ask too many
questions!
Respectful health care Finding help when you need it
•
Keep trying! You and your baby are worth the
effort it takes to get the help you need.
Added info...
If you are an immigrant, you’ll find contact
information for organizations that can help you
and your family on page 99.
Welcome
7
Postpartum Care: Moms
Physical care after childbirth.... 11
Baby blues and postpartum
depression........................... 11
Immunizations....................... 33
Sex........................................ 13
Smoking................................ 34
Birth control........................... 14
Alcohol, drugs and
gambling............................ 37
• Your periods.................... 14
Mental health......................... 38
Your important role................. 17
• Self-esteem..................... 38
• Stress............................. 39
• Depression...................... 40
• Anger............................. 41
Single Parenting
And baby makes two................ 21
When parents don’t live
together.............................. 22
• When your child lives with
you.............................. 23
Take care of yourself.............. 31
Postpartum Care: Partners
• When your child lives with
the other parent............ 24
Parenting Together
Sharing parenting.................... 27
Being a couple........................ 28
8
Parent Care
Parents
Parents
Postpartum Care: Moms
Physical care after childbirth . . . . . . . . . . . . . 11
Baby blues and postpartum depression . . . . . . 11
Sex . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 13
Birth control . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 14
• Your periods . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 14
10
Postpartum Care: Moms
After you give birth, your body will slowly return
to normal. This can take 6 weeks or longer.
It’s common to have some physical discomfort
after giving birth. Talk to your health care
provider about postpartum physical care.
•
Use pads or panty liners while this bleeding
lasts.
If you’ve had a cesarean birth, you can also get
advice on postpartum care and comfort
measures from your health care provider.
Added info...
You need a postpartum check-up about 6
weeks after giving birth. This is an
important part of your health care.
Make the appointment with your health
care provider as soon as you get home
from the hospital.
Can last for up to 6 weeks
May be dark red and heavy for the first few
days
Baby blues and postpartum depression
Baby blues
Many women have very mixed feelings that start
a few days after their baby is born. This is so
common that it has a name—baby blues.
You may feel:
•
•
•
•
•
Let down, disappointed
Happy one minute and crying the next
Sad
Stressed out
Cranky
•
•
Worried
Overwhelmed
You may be very tired but still have trouble
sleeping.
Baby blues and postpartum depression
All mothers have some vaginal bleeding after
giving birth. This is a normal part of recovering
from childbirth. Vaginal bleeding:
•
•
Will lessen over time and become lighter
in colour. You may notice more bleeding
when you are more active than usual.
Physical care after childbirth
Physical care after childbirth
These feelings are normal. They usually go
away in a week or two.
If you feel like this, take care of yourself.
Ask for help and support from the people
around you. Talk to other mothers about
how you feel.
Postpartum Care: Moms
11
Postpartum depression
Postpartum depression is a kind of depression
that can happen to women after childbirth. It is a
medical condition.
Postpartum depression can happen to anyone. It
does not mean that you’re a bad mother. It just
means that you need some help to get through a
hard time.
Mothers with postpartum depression can have
many different feelings. These may include:
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
12
Sadness—crying a lot or feeling like you want
to cry
Baby blues don’t usually last longer than 2
weeks. If you still feel sad or upset after 2 weeks,
or if these feelings are getting stronger, look for
help. You can contact:
•
•
•
•
Your health care provider
Local emergency room
Local mental health clinic (contact
information, page 95), private counselor,
psychologist, psychiatrist, or social worker
Tele-Care by calling 811
Feeling helpless or hopeless
Exhausted—you can’t seem to fall asleep and
you can’t seem to wake up
Worried, panicky, full of doubts
Anxious, tense, on edge, angry
Guilty
Worthless, lonely
Confused—can’t think clearly
Having no feelings for your baby
Feeling like you want to hurt yourself or your
baby
Scary thoughts
Postpartum Care: Moms
Baby blues and postpartum depression Sex
Sex
Your body will need time to heal after childbirth—
usually about 6 weeks. Wait until your body is
ready before having vaginal sex. This may be
when any stitches have healed and your
bleeding has stopped or is very light in
colour and amount.
Many new mothers find that they are less
interested in sex for a while after their baby is
born. You’re tired. You may still be sore from the
birth. You’re busy. You’re getting used to being a
mother. All of these things can make you less
interested in sex. Wait until you feel ready.
Talk to your partner about how you feel. There
are ways to be close without having sex. You
can kiss, cuddle, massage, and hold each other.
You can talk and listen to one another. You can
do special things for one another—like running a
bath or making a favourite meal.
When you’re ready to have vaginal sex again,
start slowly and gently. Tell your partner what
feels good and what doesn’t. It may help to:
•
Use a water-based vaginal lotion or gel if
your vagina is dry.
It’s normal for your vagina to be dry after
having a baby. Using a water-based vaginal
lotion or gel can make sex more comfortable
for both you and your partner. You can get
these lotions or gels at a drugstore. You
don’t need a prescription.
•
Try new positions.
Do what’s most comfortable for you now.
•
Use birth control every time.
Until you are ready to get pregnant again, use
birth control every time you have sex. You
can get pregnant before your period
returns.
Added info...
Some breastfeeding mothers find that
their breasts leak or squirt milk during sex.
Some couples enjoy this and make it part
of their lovemaking. Some find it annoying.
You can reduce leaking by breastfeeding
your baby or expressing milk before you
have sex. Or you can keep a towel nearby
and press it against your breasts to stop
any leaks.
Postpartum Care: Moms
13
Birth control
Your body needs time to recover from pregnancy
and childbirth before you get pregnant again.
Use birth control every time you have vaginal
sex until you are ready to have another baby.
There are many different kinds of birth control
that all mothers can use after having a baby.
Talk with your health care provider. They can
help you pick the kind of birth control that will
work best for you.
Your periods
Exactly when your period returns will be different
for every woman. How you feed your baby
affects this. When you breastfeed often and
breastmilk is your baby’s only food, it could be as
long as 4 to 12 months before your period
returns. If you’re not breastfeeding, your period
will usually return in about 6 to 12 weeks.
You can get pregnant without having a
period. Use birth control every time you have
sex until you’re ready to get pregnant again.
Added info...
Latex or polyurethane male or female condoms
are the only method of birth control that can
protect you from STIs (sexually transmitted
infections).
Even if you are using another method of birth
control, you’ll still need a condom to protect
yourself from STIs.
14
Postpartum Care: Moms
Birth control
Postpartum Care: Moms
15
Postpartum Care: Partners
Your important role . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 17
16
Postpartum Care: Partners
Families come in many forms. Whatever shape
your family takes, living with a new baby can be
just as tiring and confusing for a new dad or
partner as it is for a new mom.
Added info...
There are many different kinds of families
and many different relationships in which
people love and raise children as partners
and families.
You need to get to know—and learn to take care
of—your new baby. This takes time and effort.
• You and your partner may be gay,
You may sometimes feel a bit left out. Everyone
asks about the baby or the mother. No one
seems to see that parenthood is affecting you,
too.
living apart.
• You may be birthing your baby,
•
adopting, or fostering.
• You may be raising a grandchild.
• You may be living on your own, or
sharing a home with other family
members.
Remember that you are special to your baby.
You’re not just a babysitter. You’re not just
“helping out.” You are your baby’s parent. It’s
your job to be a full partner in loving, caring for,
and raising your child.
We hope that all those who are
welcoming a new baby—or babies—into
their lives and families will feel included
here.
Share baby care.
No one “just knows” how to take care of a baby. Mothers have to learn how to change a diaper and give a bath. Partners can learn too. Your baby depends on you for loving care.
lesbian or straight.
• You may be transgender.
• Both parents may be living together or
You may also feel helpless once in a while.
You may feel the urge to “fix” things when your
partner is struggling. Becoming a family takes
time, thought, and lots of talking. You and your
partner will need to work together to support and
help one another.
•
Your important role
Your important role
•
Talk about your feelings.
Be an active parent.
New parents often have mixed feelings. You can feel proud, happy, worried, relieved, left out, and tired—all at the same time.
Spend time alone with your baby. Get to know her. Learn what makes her smile. Figure out what she wants when she cries. Hold her. Smile at her. Talk to her. Sing to her. Show her that she can trust you to love her and to be there when she needs you.
Talk to your baby’s mother. Tell her how you feel. Listen to her when she tells you how she feels. Becoming a parent can be stressful. Being able to talk to each other will help you both be better parents. It will also strengthen your ties to each other.
Postpartum Care: Partners
17
11
•
Support your baby’s mother.
New mothers need physical, emotional, and financial support.
Pregnancy and birth are hard on a woman’s body. It will take time for her to recover. She may also have mood swings or “baby blues.” She will need your help, support, and
understanding.
Some mothers develop more serious postpartum depression. Read the information about postpartum depression on page 12 of this book. If your partner shows any signs of depression, help her to get the help she needs.
18
When she’s breastfeeding, she’ll need your support, too. Breastfeeding gives your baby the best possible start in life. It contains exactly what babies need to grow strong and healthy. It protects them from allergies and illness. It can take time for mothers and babies to learn to breastfeed. Your support and encouragement make a big difference, especially if breastfeeding is not common in your family or community.
It takes time for you to learn how to best
support your partner. Be kind and patient. Ask your partner what she needs and wants. By supporting your partner as she
breastfeeds, you are giving your baby the best possible start in life.
•
Build a loving family.
Spend time with your baby and her mother. Do things together that you all enjoy. Grow together into a loving, supportive family.
Having a baby is one of the biggest changes you and your partner will have in your lives. You will grow as a parent over time. The more you put into being a parent, the more you will get out of it.
Added info...
It may be a while before your partner is
interested in having sex again.
Her body needs 6 weeks or longer to recover
from childbirth. She’s tired. Learning to be a
mother can be stressful.
• Be patient. There’s no need to rush.
You can stay close physically by kissing,
cuddling, and massaging one another.
When your partner is ready for intercourse,
start slowly. Be careful and gentle. Let her
tell you what feels good.
• Use a water-based vaginal lotion or gel
when you start having sex again. It’s
normal for a woman’s vagina to be dry after
having a baby. Using a water-based vaginal
lotion or gel can make sex more
comfortable for both you and your partner.
You can get these lotions or gels at a
drugstore. You don’t need a prescription.
• Use birth control every time you have
sex until you and your partner are ready
to have another baby. A woman can get
pregnant anytime after having a baby, even
if she hasn’t had a period.
Latex or polyurethane male or female
condoms are the only method of birth
control that can protect you from STIs
(sexually transmitted infections).
Even if you and your partner are using another method of birth control, you’ll still need a condom to protect you both from STIs.
Postpartum Care: Partners
Your important role
Postpartum Care: Partners
19
Single Parenting
And baby makes two . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 21
When parents don’t live together . . . . . . . . . . 22
• When your child lives with you . . . . . . . . . 23
• When your child lives with the
other parent . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 24
20
Single Parenting
Being a single parent is not unusual. Many
parents find themselves raising a baby without
a partner.
All of the advice in this book on taking care of
yourself physically and mentally is especially
important for you as a single parent.
Don’t forget to take some time for yourself away
from your baby. Accept offers for childcare from
friends and relatives you trust.
All of these people and groups—like friends,
family, community groups, and Family
Resource Centres—become part of your
social support network. They are the
people you can depend on in hard times.
They are the people who will help you when
you need it, and who know you’ll do the
same for them.
And baby makes two
And baby makes two
This kind of network can make a big
difference in your life and in your child’s life.
Your baby has only you to depend on, so your
health and well-being are important.
•
Find people to talk to.
Sometimes just saying what’s worrying you
out loud can help you think things through.
Having someone who will listen to you and
pay attention to what you say is important for
everyone. Sometimes you just need a friend,
neighbour, or family member who knows and
cares about you. Sometimes you need to
talk to a counselor, public health nurse, social
worker, or spiritual or religious leader.
•
Ask for help when you need it.
You’ll have questions and worries. All
parents—single or not—need help and
support sometimes. Other parents and single
parents are a great source of information and
support. So are your friends and family.
•
Look for support in your community.
Look for single-parent support groups, Family
Resource Centres (contact information, page
98), and parent-child play groups.
Single Parenting
21
11
When parents don’t live together
There are many reasons why the parents of a
child may not live together.
Each parent has a different and important role to
play in a child’s life. Whether they live together
or not, all parents share the same goal—to raise
a happy, well-adjusted child.
Many parents who don’t live together need
support to deal with their feelings. They may
need help to agree on how to parent their
child.
To do this, it’s important to:
You may find that you need counseling, legal
advice, a support network, or other kinds of
help.
•
Put your child first.
Your relationship with your child is your most
important relationship. Even though you
might be angry or resentful of the other
parent, it’s important to think about—and
do—what’s best for your child.
•
Allow your child to love and be loved by
both parents, if this is possible.
Children do best when they have a healthy
relationship with both their parents. This isn’t
always possible, but when it is, it is helpful to
respect and support the other parent’s role in
your child’s life.
•
Treat your child’s other parent with
respect.
This may not always be easy, but it’s
important for your child’s development and
happiness that you are polite and treat the
other parent with respect. It is harmful for
children to see their parents fighting. No
matter how you feel about your child’s other
parent, it’s important to separate these
feelings from your feelings about your child.
Your child learns by watching what you do.
How his parents treat one another when they
are upset or angry will be a model for him to
follow.
22
Added info...
Look for the help you need. Your health and
happiness are important to your child. Taking
care of your own needs and finding ways to
work respectfully with your child’s other
parent are important for your child’s health and
happiness.
To find out about support services in your
community, talk with your health care
provider, a Family Resource Centre (contact
information, page 98) or your local Community
Mental Health Centre (contact information,
page 95).
You’ll find information about Family Court on
the New Brunswick Courts website and about
the Family Law on the Attorney General’s
website (contact information, page 96).
If you are leaving an abusive relationship, you’ll
find information on child custody and access
in New Brunswick’s Family Law Information
Centre, a resource from the Public Legal
Education and Information Service of New
Brunswick (contact information, page 96).
Single Parenting
Work together to give your child
consistent parenting.
Young children need to know what to expect.
Change is difficult for them. Both parents
need to agree on things like rules, limits, and
bedtimes for their child. This can be difficult
and you may need professional help to work
out a parenting plan.
•
Don’t use your child as a way to get
even.
Keep your child out of your problems
with the other parent. Don’t use your
child as a weapon against the other
parent. Don’t try to keep the other
parent away from your child because
you’re angry about something else he
or she has done.
When your child lives with you
If the other parent is available and is able to
provide safe and loving care, it’s helpful for your
child’s development for both parents to be part of
her life.
•
Support the other parent’s efforts to be
part of your child’s life.
For example, suggest going to health care
provider appointments, taking your child to
visit grandparents, or going to childcare
meetings.
•
Encourage the other parent to keep in
touch with your child between visits.
For example, through phone calls, e-mail, or
sending postcards.
When parents don’t live together
•
Sometimes it isn’t possible for the other parent
to have a role in your child’s life. Whether the
reason is illness, abuse, or that the other parent
doesn’t want to be involved, your child needs to
know that:
•
•
It isn’t her fault.
She will always be taken care of and loved.
Being the main caregiver for a young child isn’t
easy. Look for help and support from friends,
family and other parents. You’ll find information
on finding help and support in the “Welcome”
section of this book.
Sometimes issues of abuse or illness may
mean that it isn’t safe for your child to be
with, or have contact with, the other
parent. In this case it’s up to you to protect
your child.
Single Parenting
23
When your child lives with the other parent
When you don’t live with your child, it’s important
to remember that your child needs you. Even if
your child is still a baby, you are setting a pattern
for your life together. You need to show your
child that you are someone he can depend on
and trust.
Be patient. Don’t give up. The more time you can
spend together, the better. It takes time, effort,
and love to develop a close bond with a child.
You are building a relationship that will last a
lifetime.
If you need help in learning how to care for your
child, ask for it. All parents need to learn about
feeding, giving baths, changing diapers,
dressing, and caring for a child. Family and
friends can be good sources of information.
Join a parents’ group and spend time with other
parents. Their advice and support can be a big
help. Family Resource Centres are often a good
place to find parent groups (contact information,
page 98).
There are many things you can do to be part of
your child’s life.
•
PLAN to spend time with your child.
•
Do what you say you’re going to do.
Spending time with you is an important part
of your child’s life. Make the time you spend
with your child an important part of your life,
too. Organize your life to make it happen.
For example, if you tell your child you’ll be
there for a birthday party, be there. Be a
person your child can depend on.
•
Do things together.
You don’t have to do anything special. You
don’t have to give your child treats. Talk,
play, and do everyday things together. What
your child wants most is just to be with you.
•
Keep in touch.
Send your child cards, letters, postcards and
e-mails. Talk on the phone. Let your child
know you think about him when you’re not
together.
24
Single Parenting
When parents don’t live together
25
Single Parenting
Parenting Together
Sharing parenting . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 27
Being a couple . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 28
26
Parenting Together
As parents and partners, you share many
things—your love for your baby, your concern for
her welfare, your desire to be good parents.
It’s also important that you share in the day-today work of caring for your baby. When you
feed, bathe, change diapers, dress, rock, and
play with your baby, you’re letting her know that
you love her. Your baby needs to know that she
can count on loving care from both parents.
Decide with your partner how to share the work
of caring for a home and baby.
Every family is different, so the ways you find to
share in raising your baby will be different too.
These suggestions might make it a bit easier for
you to work things out.
•
•
•
Moms need to give their partner a chance
to learn to take care of their baby.
Mothers often get a head start on learning
to do things like change, wash, feed, and
comfort their baby. It can be hard to let go
and give your partner a chance. It can be
even harder to stand back and let your
partner do things differently than you would.
Try not to criticize. Try not to step in and take
over while your partner is caring for the baby.
Your baby needs you both.
Dads and partners need to keep trying.
It can be easy to back off and let mom do it
when she criticizes how you change a diaper
or comfort your baby. Try not to take it
personally. Maybe she can do the job faster,
but remind her that you need to learn, too.
Tell her that you’ll all be better off if both of
you know how to take care of your baby.
It’s not just baby care that parents need to
share.
You need to share all the work of caring for
each other, a home, and a baby. This means
•
•
finding a way to share things like
cooking, cleaning, shopping, laundry,
baby care, and work outside the home.
When parents find ways to share the
work, they both have more time to share
the fun of being a family.
Sharing parenting
Sharing parenting
Parents need to keep talking.
Talk about how you feel. Your partner
can’t read your mind. If you’re feeling
overworked, say so. If you’re feeling
left out, say so. Talk about how you
can help and support each other.
Parents need to respect each other’s
“parenting style.”
No two parents are alike, even when
they’re the parents of the same baby.
Many new parents are surprised to find
that they and their partner have different
ideas about how to raise their baby.
They may not always agree about the
best way to handle things like crying or
bedtimes.
This means that they have different styles of parenting—they will do things differently and see their child in a
different way.
The key is to respect each other’s
parenting style and find a way to work together. It’s confusing for children to get different treatment from each parent. It upsets them to hear their parents
disagreeing about what to do.
Working out your differences now, when the baby is small, will help you to
understand each other’s point of view as your baby gets older and new issues come up. This takes time, patience, and lots of talking about what’s important to each of you.
Parenting Together
27
11
Being a couple
Most couples find that having a baby is a happy,
but stressful, event. It can put a strain on any
relationship. You put so much energy and effort
into being good parents, there’s often little left over
for each other.
•
Say something nice to each other every
day.
Everyone needs to feel appreciated and loved.
At least once a day, thank your partner for
doing something. Tell him or her what a great
job they’re doing as a parent. Say, “I love you.”
Don’t take one another for granted. Remind
yourselves about what you love about each
other.
•
Touch each other.
Your relationship with each other is important—to
you and to your baby. Happy parents make happy
families.
•
Talk about what you’ve done all day. Find
something to laugh about together. Talk about
your worries and fears. Even if you only
have a few minutes a day, this will give you a
chance to connect with one another.
•
Spend time together.
28
Talk to each other.
Touch is a way of showing love. A backrub, a
foot rub, a kiss, a hug, a touch on the hand all
say “I love you” without words.
It doesn’t matter what you do, where you go, or
whether you go anywhere at all. Just being
together is the goal. Even an hour together
can be fun.
Parenting Together
Being a couple
Parenting Together
29
Parent Care
Take care of yourself . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 31
Immunizations . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 33
Smoking . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 34
Alcohol, drugs and gambling . . . . . . . . . . . . . 37
Mental health . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 38
• Self-esteem . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 38
• Stress . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 39
• Depression . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 40
• Anger . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 41
30
Parent Care
Take care of yourself
Take care of yourself
Babies bring love and joy. They also bring
change.
A baby changes how everything happens in your
home and your life. Becoming a parent changes
how you look at yourself and how you see your
place in the world.
Change is very tiring, even when you welcome it.
Most parents are surprised at how tired and
overwhelmed they feel for the first few months.
Caring for a baby takes a lot of physical and
mental energy. It seems like your baby needs
your care, love, and attention every minute of the
day—and most of the night. It’s easy to feel as if
being a parent is taking over your entire life.
Remind yourself that this time in your life is really
very short—even if sometimes it doesn’t seem
that way. Enjoy it!
It’s not selfish to take a little time for yourself.
You’re still a person as well as your baby’s
parent. You’ll take better care of your baby
when you take care of yourself.
•
•
Don’t do anything you don’t have to
do.
You can make a list of chores from most
important to least important. Do only the
things that you MUST do to take care of
yourself, your baby, and other children.
•
Ask for help when you need it.
Get as much sleep as you can.
Rest when your baby sleeps. Turn off the
phone. Hang a note on the door that says,
“Do not disturb. Baby sleeping.” Getting in a
nap while your baby sleeps can be difficult if
you also have a toddler to care for. You can
try to time your toddler’s naps to match your
baby’s. You can also try snuggling down to
read or spend quiet time with your toddler
while your baby sleeps. Maybe you’ll both
drift off to sleep together.
Take help when it’s offered. Family,
friends, and neighbours can help with
jobs like food shopping, cooking,
cleaning, and laundry. Make a “wish
list” of things you’d like help with. That
way, you can ask for what you need or
when someone offers to help, you’ll
remember what you need most.
Parent Care
31
11
•
Find someone to talk to.
Other parents are a great source of
information, ideas, and support. You’ll feel
better knowing you’re not the only one with
questions, feelings, and problems.
Playgrounds, coffee shops, malls, libraries, and parks are some good places to meet other parents. You may feel shy about talking to someone you don’t know, but try it. Other parents are probably as eager to talk as you are.
•
Join a group for parents.
Look for parents’ groups, mothers’ groups,
fathers’ groups, play groups, and Family
Resource Centres (contact information, page
98) in your community. Community centres,
churches, temples, and mosques often offer
parent and play groups.
•
Make some time for yourself every day.
Try to find some time to be alone. Do
something that makes you feel good. Go
for a walk or a run. Take a shower or bath.
Watch a TV show. Talk to a friend. Read.
•
Take care of your own health.
Most parents take good care of their baby’s
health—sometimes better care than they take
of their own. Your baby and family need you well and strong! Taking care of your
health is important for you and your family.
Preventing illness is an important part of taking
care of yourself. You’ll find contact information
for cancer prevention resources on page 97.
32
Added info...
Your health and your environment
Part of taking care of yourself is taking care
of your environment. There are many factors
in the indoor and outdoor environment that
can affect both your health and your children’s
health.
If you have questions or concerns about
environmental issues—like air or water quality
in your home or community—contact your
Regional Health Protection Branch (contact
information, page 95).
Parent Care
Immunizations are not just for babies and
children.
Keeping your own immunizations up to date will
protect your health as well as your child’s.
Every adult should get:
•
•
Flu vaccine every year
•
A pertussis shot (whooping cough) once as
an adult, especially if they are in regular contact with infants and young children
If you have never had measles, mumps,
rubella (German measles) or chickenpox,
and have never been immunized for them,
you should get these immunizations as well.
Talk to your health care provider about
getting the immunizations you need.
A tetanus shot and diphtheria shot every 10
years
Parent Care
Take care of yourself Immunizations
Immunizations
33
Smoking
One of the best things you can do for your own
health—as well as for your baby’s—is to not
smoke.
their unborn baby. It’s important for your own
health—as well as for your baby’s—to remain a
non-smoker after your baby is born.
Many parents stop smoking before their baby is
born because they know that smoking can hurt
Five reasons why you might be tempted to smoke again
and some things you can do instead.
1.
People around you are smoking and you can’t resist.
It can be very hard to stay quit if your partner or
others living with you still smoke. Friends and
family who smoke can also make it difficult for
you. Ask for their help. Ask them not to smoke
around you or your baby. Ask them not to offer
2.
Smoking reminds you of what your life was like before you had a baby to look after.
Being a parent may be harder than you think it
will be. Everything is different. You may feel tied
down. You may be more tired than you thought
you’d be. It can make you long for the fun and
freedom you used to have.
3.
Find ways to have fun now. Play with your baby.
Take him for walks. Make friends with other
parents. Join a play group. Find a babysitter and
go out. Do something you enjoy with someone
you like being with. Take care of yourself. Do
things that make you feel good about yourself
and your new life.
You think that smoking will help you handle your feelings and stress.
There is stress in everyone’s life. There are
other ways to handle stress than by smoking.
34
you cigarettes. Ask a few close friends or family
members to be your support system—people
you can call on for help when you want to
smoke.
You’ll find some ideas on page 39 of this book.
Parent Care
You think you can just smoke a little—just one puff or one cigarette.
One of the things that people do to stop smoking
is to smoke fewer and fewer cigarettes over a
period of time. Unfortunately, the opposite thing
starts to happen when you smoke “just one.”
Gradually you will smoke more and more until
you are back to where you were before you quit.
If you have started smoking again, think of it as
a “slip,” not a failure. Becoming smoke free is
a process. It may take many tries to be smoke
free. You’ve quit before. You can do it again.
When you feel the urge to smoke:
•
Think about why you stopped smoking in
the first place. Smoking is still bad for your
health and your baby’s health.
5.
•
Stay away from places and activities that
make you want to smoke. For example,
if you smoke when you meet friends
for coffee, meet them somewhere else
where you won’t be tempted to smoke.
•
Do something else. Eat a carrot. Brush
your teeth. If you want to smoke after
eating, get right up from the table. Go for
a walk or do something you enjoy.
•
Remind yourself of how much better you
feel when you stop smoking.
•
Call a friend and talk when you feel like
smoking.
Smoking
4.
You didn’t really want to quit in the first place and only did it because you—or
your partner—were pregnant.
Quitting during pregnancy was a wonderful gift—
to yourself and to your baby. You gave him a
healthier parent. You kept him safe so he could
grow and be healthy. He still needs your
protection.
Tobacco smoke is just as bad for your baby
now as it was during pregnancy—maybe worse.
When a mother—or anyone around her—smokes
during pregnancy, the smoke she breathes in
affects the baby. Now, your baby breathes in
even more smoke—the smoke her parents
exhale as well as the smoke from burning
cigarettes.
This secondhand smoke is very bad for
children’s health. When their parents
smoke, children have more:
•
Ear infections
•
Colds and sore throats
•
Asthma
•
Lung infections
•
Allergies
•
Coughing and wheezing
•
SIDS (Sudden Infant Death
Syndrome)
Parent Care
35
Added info...
It can be harder to stop smoking if there is a lot
of stress in your life.
Protect your children from second- and
third-hand smoke.
Stress can come from many places. For
example, you can feel stress from poverty,
feeling alone, or from discrimination you face
because of your race, gender, or sexual
orientation.
You’ll find information on this in any one of the
other Loving Care books.
Services that can help you stop smoking are
available in a number of languages. The
people who offer these services will respect
your ethnicity, culture, race, sexual orientation
and gender.
Added info...
Stopping smoking is worth the effort. You can
find support by calling the Smokers’ Helpline.
Smokers’ Helpline offers free phone support
and information about programs and services
to help you stop smoking or smoke less.
Phone: 1-877-513-5333
Smokers’ Helpline Online is an interactive
web-based service available 24 hours a day 7
days a week. The website features a
discussion board, quit meter, quit buddies, and
inspirational e-mails.
Website: www.smokershelpline.ca
36
Parent Care
Gambling, alcohol and other drugs become a
problem when your use of them affects your own
well-being or the well-being of the people around
you. They can affect your ability to give your
children the love and care they need.
Alcohol is the most commonly used drug and
it has health and safety risks. Many long-term
chronic health conditions such as breast cancer
and heart diseases have links to alcohol. The
more you drink, the greater the risks. Women are
at a greater risk of harm from alcohol than men.
If you drink alcohol, you can use the national
low risk alcohol drinking guidelines to help
reduce your risk of long- and short-term
problems. You’ll find a copy on page 134.
Gambling can also put you at risk for health
and financial problems that can hurt you and
your children, friends and community.
You are an important model for how your
children learn about alcohol, other drugs and
gambling. For example, if your children see you
drinking moderately, chances are better that
they will also be moderate drinkers when they
grow up. You can show your children that they
don’t need alcohol to have a good time by having
social gatherings that don’t include alcohol.
Look for help if you think alcohol, other drugs
or gambling are hurting you, your family or your
children. You don’t have to deal with this alone.
There are counsellors, community organizations
and other services that you can talk to.
Look for help from:
•
•
•
Addiction Services (contact information,
page 94)
Alcoholics Anonymous / Al Anon
(check your local phone book for
contact information)
Narcotics Anonymous (check your local
phone book for contact information)
•
Gambling Information Line
(1-800-461-1234)
•
Health care providers
If you have problems with addictions of any
kind, you owe it to yourself and your
children to get the help you need.
Smoking Alcohol, drugs and gambling
Alcohol, drugs and gambling
Added info...
It can be harder to deal with an addiction
if there is a lot of stress in your life.
Stress can come from many places. For
example, you can feel stress from poverty,
feeling alone, or from discrimination you
face because of your race, gender, or
sexual orientation.
The people who offer addictions services
will respect your ethnicity, culture, race,
sexual orientation and gender.
If you need interpretation services, you
can ask your addictions counselor for a
cultural health interpreter.
Parent Care
37
Mental health
Self-esteem
Self-esteem—feeling good about yourself and
what you do—is important for parents. Part of
your job as a parent is to help your children feel
good about themselves. You do this with your
loving care and by responding to their needs.
This teaches children that they matter. It builds
their self-esteem.
It’s a lot easier to help your children feel good
about themselves when you feel good about
yourself.
Being a parent is a tough job. Parents learn as
they go—and everyone makes lots of mistakes.
It’s easy to feel bad about everything that goes
wrong. It’s easy to think that everyone else is a
better parent or a better person than you are.
One way to build your self-esteem is to focus on
what you do right.
•
•
38
Think about the good things in your life.
•
Do things for yourself.
Make plans. Set goals. Take small steps
toward reaching them. Give yourself a pat
on the back for every little step that gets you
closer to your goal.
Added info...
You may find it hard to respond to your child
with the love and care he needs. There are
many reasons for this—for example, you may
have had a difficult childhood yourself.
You need to deal with your own feelings so
you can build a loving bond with your child.
If you are worried about this, talk to a health
care provider or Family Resource Centre.
They can help you get the support you need
(contact information, page 98).
Be proud of what you do. Make your baby
laugh. Give a friend a hug. Smile—at
yourself, at your baby, at your partner, and
your friends. A smile makes everyone feel
better. Helping others feel good about
themselves can make you feel good, too.
Be fair to yourself.
Nobody does everything right, every time.
When things go wrong, you might find
yourself thinking, “I’m stupid,” or “I’m
useless.” Stop yourself right there. Instead
say, “I’m smart. I can handle this.” Build
yourself up. Believe in yourself.
Parent Care
New parents may feel stressed for many
reasons.
•
•
You’re tired.
You may feel overwhelmed by everything that
needs to be done. For example, when the
house is dirty, the laundry piles up and you
can’t seem to get to it.
•
You have less time—for yourself, for your
partner, your other children, your job.
•
You may have concerns about money, jobs,
or housing.
•
You’re getting advice about parenting from
everyone you know. And they’re all telling
you something different.
These ideas have helped other parents handle
the stress in their life.
•
Take care of yourself.
Eat well and get the rest you need.
•
Slow down.
Relax. Have a cup of tea. Take a few
minutes for yourself.
•
Go for a walk. Get some fresh air.
•
Learn to say “no.”
Having too much to do can cause a lot of
stress. Focus on doing what needs to be
done. Say “no” to other things.
•
Find someone to talk to.
•
Look for help if you need it.
There is lots of help in the community—
for example you can try:
Mental health
Stress
This could be a friend, partner, family
member, or someone you trust. Don’t
keep your feelings bottled up.
• Mental Health Services
(contact information, page 95)
• Family Resource Centres
(contact information, page 98)
•
• Support groups
Solve the problems you can.
Concentrate on the things that are
important to you. Try to let other things go.
Parent Care
39
Depression
Depression is an illness. It can happen to
anyone. It doesn’t mean that you’re a bad
parent.
Look for help if you feel like this for more than 2
weeks. You can contact:
Depression is like a grey cloud over your spirits.
Nothing you do seems to make you feel better.
You’re not interested in the people or things you
used to care about.
When you are depressed, you might feel:
40
•
•
Helpless and hopeless
•
Exhausted—you can’t seem to fall asleep and
you can’t seem to wake up
•
•
•
•
•
•
Anxious
Sad—crying a lot or feeling like you want to
cry
Tense, on edge, angry
Guilty
Worthless, lonely, full of doubts
•
•
•
Your health care provider
Local emergency room
Local Mental Health clinic
(contact information, page 95), private
counselor, psychologist, psychiatrist, or social
worker
Depression can be treated. It’s important for
you—and your family—that you get the help you
need.
If you feel like you might hurt yourself or your
child, or if you have scary thoughts, you need
to act quickly.
•
Confused—can’t think clearly
Worried, panicky
Parent Care
See a health care provider or go to the
emergency room right away
All parents get angry. Anger is a normal emotion
and everyone feels it. Getting angry doesn’t
mean that you’re a bad parent. It doesn’t mean
that you don’t love your children. It means that
you’re human.
What’s important is learning to express your
anger in ways that won’t hurt your children.
It is frightening for children to see a parent
get angry. It can be frightening for a parent
to feel that he or she is losing control.
You can find ways to handle your anger
that won’t hurt you, your children, or anyone
else.
Mental health
Anger
What’s really making you mad?
Not enough money. Not enough time. Not
enough sleep. A bad job or no job at all. Noisy
neighbours. Trouble in a relationship. Fights
with your own parents. Car trouble.
Everyone has things in their life that can make
them frustrated and angry.
Family Resource Centres (contact
information, page 98), and other community
organizations may offer anger management
programs or be able to help you find one.
Look for the help you need. You and your
children are worth it.
Parenting is a big part of your life, but it’s not
the only part. Sometimes the real cause of your
anger has nothing to do with your children. What
they do is just the trigger that sets off the anger
you feel about other things.
It’s important to understand the real source of
your anger so that you won’t take it out on your
kids.
In order to deal with your anger, you need
to know what’s causing it. Sometimes this is
easy to see. Sometimes it’s not. You may need
to talk to a counselor who has experience in
helping people deal with their anger.
Parent Care
41
What to do when you feel angry
Learn to notice when you START
to get angry.
Anger has stages. It builds up bit by bit. Sometimes anger builds up slowly. Sometimes you can get very angry, very fast.
It can be very helpful to notice when you’re starting to get angry and do something about it before you explode.
The stages of anger are:
1. You feel bothered by something: The kids are being very noisy, and you have a headache.
2. You feel more upset:
You ask them to quiet down and they don’t.
3. You get angry:
You tell them to be quiet now.
The noise gets louder.
4. Now you’re really mad:
You start yelling. They start screaming.
5. You’re ready to explode:
You want to hit someone or something!
•
Do it.
•
Leave the room.
Be sure your baby or child is in a safe place. If your child is old enough to understand, you can say, “I’m getting angry. I need a time-out to calm down.” This not only spares your children seeing you explode, it also shows them what to do when they get angry.
Do whatever you need to do to calm down.
Take deep breaths. Lie down and close your eyes. Make faces in the mirror.
Return to your children when you feel in control.
•
•
Say you’re sorry if you lose your temper.
Tell your child that you were wrong to get angry.
When you notice that you’re getting upset or angry:
•
•
Stop.
Take a deep breath.
It is NEVER okay to hit or shake your baby or child.
Think.
What’s going on? Why are you
getting angry?
42
Decide what to do.
What do you want to happen? What do you want your child to learn? What can you do to get closer to that goal?
Take a time-out if you feel
yourself losing control.
Act BEFORE you get angry.
•
Parent Care
Mental health
Parent Care
43
Family Care
Brothers and Sisters
Eating for wellness...................47
A little baby makes big
changes............................... 69
• How do you feel about food?...47
• Family meals are a time
for sharing.....................48
Helping children get along
together................................ 70
• What you can do to make
eating for wellness part of
your children’s life..........49
• Steps toward eating for
wellness.........................49
Being active............................51
Screen time.............................52
Marketing to children...............53
Family safety...........................54
• Fire safety........................54
• Car seats..........................55
• Sun safety........................55
• Overheating......................57
• Insect bites.......................57
• Safety around animals.......59
• Family food safety.............60
• Safe drinking water...........62
• Lead poisoning.................62
Life changes—loss and grief......63
• Helping small children
handle grief...................64
Sharing your values and
traditions with your children....65
Family violence........................66
44
Families
Sibling rivalry......................... 71
Grandparents
Grandparents are learning too... 75
Families
Family Care
Eating for wellness...........................................47
• How do you feel about food?.......................47
• Family meals are a time for sharing............48
• What you can do to make eating for
wellness part of your children’s life..........49
• Steps toward eating for wellness.................49
Being active....................................................51
Screen time.....................................................52
Marketing to children.......................................53
Family safety...................................................54
• Fire safety................................................54
• Car seats..................................................55
• Sun safety................................................55
• Overheating..............................................57
• Insect bites...............................................57
• Safety around animals...............................59
• Family food safety.....................................60
• Safe drinking water...................................62
• Lead poisoning.........................................62
Life changes—loss and grief..............................63
• Helping small children handle grief.............64
Sharing your values and traditions with your
children.......................................................65
Family violence................................................66
46
Family Care
“Wellness” means feeling good—in your body,
your mind, and your emotions. It means having
people around who care about you.
Eating well helps us to feel well. Food fuels our
body, mind, and spirit.
When you feel well, you feel good about
yourself. You have the energy you need to live
your life and give your children the loving care
they need.
Added info...
You’ll find good advice about the foods you
need to feel well and be healthy in Eating
Well with Canada’s Food Guide.
Eating for wellness
Eating for wellness
You’ll find a copy in the “Resources” section in
the back of this book.
How do you feel about food?
Food means different things to different people.
You may have happy memories linked to food,
like baking cookies with your grandmother,
eating dinner with your family, or big holiday
meals. There may also be some unhappy
memories, like being forced to clean your plate or
being punished by being sent to bed without
dinner.
How you think and feel about food will affect how
you feed your children and what you teach them
about food and eating. You are your children’s
most important teacher and role model. It can be
helpful to think about where your eating habits
and ideas about food have come from. Then you
can decide which of these you want to share with
your children.
You can start by asking yourself some questions
about your own childhood.
•
•
•
Did your family eat meals together?
Did you watch television while you ate?
Added info...
Who decides what you eat?
We are surrounded with so much
information about food and so many food
choices, that it can be hard to decide
what’s best for you and your family.
Advertisements for fast food, junk food,
and expensive brands can make it difficult
to make choices about how to spend your
food budget. Even very young children
are affected by these messages.
As a parent, it’s important that you
understand your own values around food.
Be aware of the influence that marketing
can have on your food choices.
For information on marketing to children,
see page 53.
Did your parents encourage you to try new
foods?
Family Care
47
•
•
Did you prepare food together?
•
•
•
Did you have to eat everything on your plate?
•
Did you have to finish certain foods—like
vegetables, for example—before you could
have dessert?
•
Was food ever in short supply when you were
growing up?
Did you grow some of your own food in a
garden?
Did your parents encourage you to eat just
until you were full, even if there was still food
left on your plate?
Were there times when there wasn’t enough
food to go around?
Can you think of other ways that food affected
your childhood?
Use these questions as a way to start thinking
and talking about how your ideas about food
were formed. Think about how you want your
children to think about food and eating. Talk
about these issues with everyone who lives
with—or eats with—your children.
Decide what you will do to make eating well a
happy part of your family’s life.
Family meals are a time for sharing
Mealtime can be a time to share and to learn—
to talk about the day, to catch up with one
another, and to learn about the food you’re
eating together. Making this time together an
important part of your family life can make
eating well fun for everyone.
Sharing family meals doesn’t just mean eating
together. It can include everything involved in
getting the meal on the table. Even small
children can share in:
•
•
Shopping—avoid the snack aisle when
shopping with children!
•
•
Preparing or cooking the meal
48
Deciding what to eat—offer healthy options
for your children to choose from. For
example, an apple or a pear, peas or carrots.
•
•
Eating
Cleaning up
Keep mealtimes calm and pleasant. This isn’t
the time to argue or fight. Turn off the TV and
focus on one another.
Added info...
Families come in many different shapes
and sizes.
When we say “family” we mean people
who care about one another. They may
or may not live together, but they are
important in each other’s lives.
Your family can be you and your baby or
can include whoever you want it to.
Setting the table
Family Care
•
Be a good example. Eat well yourself. Sit
down and eat with your children.
•
•
Have regular meal and snack times. You
are in charge of when your child eats. Don’t
offer food just to keep your child happy.
Don’t use food as a reward or punishment.
•
•
Encourage children to eat, but don’t force
them. Trust them to eat the amount of food
they need to grow and be healthy.
•
Involve the whole family in planning and
preparing meals. Give your children happy
memories of their own.
Offer healthy foods for snacks and at
meals. You are in charge of what you
buy and what you offer your children.
Make mealtimes family times. Turn
off the TV and enjoy sharing a meal and
spending time together. Make feeding
times for babies and mealtimes for
children times for learning, sharing, and
love.
•
Offer new foods. Give your children the
chance to try new tastes and textures.
Shop for basic foods from Eating Well with Canada’s Food Guide. You’ll save money by buying fewer pre-packaged and convenience foods.
Eating for wellness
What you can do to make eating for wellness part of your children’s life
Steps toward eating for wellness
•
Small changes can make a big difference.
Learning to eat for wellness takes time. You
can do it slowly by making small changes in
the way you eat. For example, you can try:
•Eating more fruits and vegetables
• Drinking more water every day
•
• Choosing snacks lower in fat and sugar
• Eating more whole grain breads and cereals
Look for ways to eat well for less money.
Look around your community for lower cost
food choices. You can try farmers’ markets,
local trading systems, and community
gardens. Foods grown close to home are
fresher because they get from the field to
your table faster. Supporting local markets
and community gardens also helps build your
community. You’ll learn more about food and
meet new people. And it can be a lot of fun!
•
Learn more about cooking.
Cooking is a skill. Everybody learns by
watching others, asking for advice, and
trying. Cooking and eating simple,
nourishing meals together can be fun for
the whole family. It will give your children
a good start toward a lifetime of healthy
eating.
• Pick basic, easy recipes.
• Shop for healthy, basic ingredients.
• When your children are old enough, let them help with shopping and
cooking.
• Share the food by eating together as a family.
Community kitchens and local cooking programs can help you learn how to cook for less. Look for information about these
Family Care
49
programs from Family Resource Centres, local
supermarkets, and other parents. Talking with
other parents and family members can be a good
way to get ideas for shopping and cooking. Your
local library will have many cookbooks you can
borrow. You can also get good information from
registered dietitians.
• Eating out once in a while is a treat everyone
enjoys. To make healthy choices when eating
out:
• Choose milk, 100% juice, or water to • Choose foods from several food • Look for choices that are lower in fat, •
50
Eat well when you eat out.
• Plan for more than one meal at a time. • Focus on healthy snacks. When time is For example, make extra for supper and use the leftovers for lunch the next day.
short, you may miss a meal once in a while. Make sure you have healthy snacks on hand so you and your children don’t fill up on less healthy foods. Carry healthy foods with you when you’re out. Fruit, cereal bars, and whole grain
crackers are healthier choices.
drink.
groups. Check Eating Well with Canada’s Food Guide for choices in each food group.
sugar, and salt. Look for foods that are steamed, broiled, baked, roasted, poached, or stir-fried. Ask for salad dressing, sauces, and gravy on the side.
• Eat only as much as you need. Some restaurants serve very large amounts of food—more than one person can eat. Don’t force yourself to eat it all. Take what you can’t finish home for later.
When you’re pressed for time, plan meals in advance.
Being a parent and raising a family takes a lot
of time. When you also work outside of the
home, time can be in very short supply.
Planning ahead can help you make sure
you—and your family—eat well.
• When you cook, double the recipe. • Pick a day and make several meals to You’ll find information about preparing and storing
food safely in “Family Food Safety” on page 60.
Added info...
Sometimes getting enough healthy food to meet
the needs of your family can be a challenge. At
one time or another, this can be true for anyone.
These times can be very stressful.
Check out groups in your community that can
offer support with food options—for example,
cooking clubs, community gardens, and other
programs. Call your local Family Resource
Centres, local farmers’ markets, food banks, and
other service agencies to learn about resources
in your community.
Many groups in New Brunswick are working on
projects and ideas to improve access to local
food in the community and welcome volunteers.
Freeze half for another day.
freeze for later. This can be fun if you do it with a friend.
Family Care
Fitting exercise into life with a young family can
be a challenge. But believe it or not, the more
active you are, the less tired you’ll feel.
You need about 30 to 60 minutes of activity each
day to stay healthy. You don’t need to get it all
at once. Ten minutes here and there of walking,
climbing stairs, or active play with your child add
up over the day.
•
Walk whenever you can.
You can walk even during the winter. Start with a 10-minute walk—gradually increase the time. Walk to the store. Walk to do your errands whenever you can. Look for walking paths near your home. Take your kids with you.
•
Play with your children.
•
Look for activities or programs where you live.
You might find exercise classes or
parent and child activities. You can
contact your local recreation
department, community centre,
or YM/YWCA .
The benefits of being active are endless—
for you and your family. You’ll be healthier
and feel happier. And spending active time
together will bring you closer to one another.
Start slowly. Do more over time. You’ll feel
better and be an active example for your
children.
Eating for wellness Being active
Being active
Roll around on the floor together. Dance around the room holding your baby.
Family Care
51
Screen time
Children learn best and have the most fun
playing with people and exploring their world.
There is a lot of research showing that sitting a
child in front of a TV or computer screen won’t
help her brain develop. This is true even for
shows that are made for young children. In fact,
the more time a baby or young child spends
watching TV or videos, or playing video games,
the more likely screen time is to have a bad
effect. Children who spend time with TV, videos,
and video games learn fewer words and have
more difficulty focusing.
•
To help your child develop:
Limit the amount of time your child spends watching TV or videos, or
playing with video games.
If your child watches TV or videos, watch with her. Talk to her about what you’re seeing and hearing. The Canadian Paediatric Society recommends that
families limit the amount of time they spend watching TV or videos to less than 1 to 2 hours per day. Other experts
suggest that no screen time at all is best for children under 2 years of age.
•
Don’t keep the TV on all the time.
52
The more time a child spends in front of a screen, the less time she spends in active play. Children need at least 2 hours of active play every day.
Playing alone, playing with you, doing things for
herself, and being active are more important for
your child’s development—in mind and body—
than any video, TV show, or computer game.
Screen time—with TV, videos, and computers—
can’t replace your love and attention. Screen
time can’t replace the benefits your child gets
from playing.
•
Encourage your child to be active.
It will distract your child while she’s
playing and learning. Even if your child doesn’t seem to be paying attention to it, TV can still be distracting.
Family Care
Marketing aimed at children is everywhere. Its
goal is to encourage you to buy certain products.
You’ll find marketing on TV, on the internet, and
in movies, games, and video games. For
example, you’ll see the characters from children’s
favourite TV shows on food, clothing, sheets,
towels, video games, toys, diapers, vitamins,
books, and many other products. Many of the
most heavily advertised products promote
violence for boys and encourage girls to be sexy
or focus on how they look. They push children to
grow up before they are ready.
Marketing both shapes and reflects our society. It
can affect children’s values and beliefs. It is very
difficult to protect your child from all marketing.
Your child learns from your example. Follow
your own values when deciding what you
buy and what you allow your child to see and
hear.
Added info...
Marketing is aimed at parents too. You
may feel pressure to buy things for your
child from the media and from other
parents. Think about whether you will—or
will not—let this pressure influence the
choices you make.
Screen time Marketing to children
Marketing to children
What you can do is:
•
•
Be aware of it.
Think about how what your child hears and sees compares to the values you want to share with him.
•
Limit your child’s exposure to messages you don’t agree with. It’s up to you to
decide what TV, video games, and movies your child sees. For example, turn off the television. The fewer messages your child sees, the less influence they will have. Make sure that everyone who cares for your child knows your rules about what he can watch.
•
As your child gets older, talk to him about the messages he sees and hears. Help him figure out what’s true and what isn’t.
Family Care
53
Family safety
Fire safety
To prevent injuries and death from fires:
•
Keep a fire extinguisher within reach in the kitchen.
Read the information that comes with it. Check the “best before” date often to be sure it hasn’t expired.
•
Store matches, lighters, lighter fluid, gas, and candles out of reach of
children.
•Have smoke detectors in your home.
• Be sure all smoke detectors in your
home have the ULC stamp of approval.
•
• Read and follow every step of the manufacturer’s directions when you install your smoke detectors.
• Install smoke detectors outside each bedroom and sleeping area and on every level of your home, including the basement.
Added info...
Emergencies like floods and hurricanes don’t
happen often, but when they do, it’s good to be
prepared.
You can get added information about emergency
planning from the Red Cross and the
Department of Public Safety (contact information
page 99).
• Test them regularly to be sure they are still working. Check the batteries when the time changes in the Spring and Fall.
• For more information on smoke detectors contact Consumer Product Safety (contact information, page 99).
54
If a fire should ever happen, you and your family will need to get out of your home quickly. Thinking this through in advance can save your lives.
For information on fire safety, fire prevention, and
escape plans, contact your local fire department.
You’ll find contact information on the first page in
your phone book.
Have a fire escape plan.
Family Care
Car seats save lives. When you use the right
car seat in the right way, you can lower the risk
that your child will be hurt or killed in a crash by
70%. Look for a car seat that has the Transport
Canada safety mark.
Never leave your child alone in a car, not
even for a few minutes.
Family safety
Car seats
In New Brunswick, it is the law that your baby
must be in a car seat whenever she is in a car or
truck. Protect your child by using a car seat on
every ride, including when travelling with grandparents, caregivers or in taxis.
You’ll find information on how to choose and
install car seats in Be Safe and Keep Kids Safe:
A Parent’s Guide to Car Seats. You’ll find a
copy in the “Resources” section in the back of
this book.
Look for this safety mark.
Sun safety
No matter what their race or skin colour, all
children need protection from the sun.
Babies’ and children’s skin burns easily and
needs protection whenever you go outside.
Babies and children can get a sunburn even on
cloudy days. They can also get a burn from light
reflected from sand, snow, water, or concrete.
To protect your child from the sun:
•
Keep your child in the shade.
It’s especially important to keep him out of the sun between 11 am and 4 pm when the sun is strongest.
•
Cover up.
sunburn. Keep your child covered in
lightweight clothing. Protect his eyes with
sunglasses that block both UVA and UVB
rays.
Physical sunblocks—like clothing and hats—are your best protection against
Be sure your child wears a hat that:
• Shades the face, back of the neck,
• Is easy to keep on
and ears
• Is made from tightly woven fabric.
This allows less UV radiation to
pass through.
Your child also needs to be protected from
the sun while in a stroller or baby carrier.
Family Care
55
•
Use sunscreen.
Read sunscreen packages carefully. Look for a sunscreen that:
•
•
Is SPF 15 or higher
Protects against both UVA and UVB rays—this is sometimes called “broad spectrum sunscreen”
• Is waterproof
• Is non-irritating and hypoallergenic
Some sunscreens contain insect repellent. If
you are using this kind of sunscreen, treat it like
an insect repellent, not a sunscreen. Follow the
directions on page 58. If you want to use a
separate sunscreen and repellent at the same
time, apply the sunscreen first. Wait 20
minutes. Then apply the insect repellent.
Follow the directions on page 58.
Sunscreen has an expiry date. Check to be sure
it’s still good before you use it.
Put sunscreen on 20 minutes before you go out.
Sunscreen that contains zinc oxide or titanium
oxide will protect your child right away. It doesn’t
need to be applied 20 minutes before you go out.
When you apply sunscreen be sure to cover any
skin that’s showing. This includes face, ears,
nose, back of the neck, and the tops of the feet.
Kids are squirmy! It’s easy to miss a spot.
Babies under 1 year should not be in direct
sunlight outdoors.
Protect them in a covered stroller, under an
umbrella, or in the shade. Be sure that they
wear a hat, sunglasses and clothes that cover
their arms and legs. Use sunscreen to protect
them from reflected sunlight.
Don’t put sunscreen around children’s eyes—it
can sting.
Reapply sunscreen often when you’re
outdoors—at least every two hours or after
swimming.
Added info...
Days at the beach and special events like
Canada Day picnics can be fun for the whole
family. But if you’re not careful, a long day
outdoors can lead to sunburn.
Remember: Keep your child covered, take
breaks from the sun, reapply sunscreen often,
and carry water with you.
56
Family Care
Infants and small children overheat easily in hot,
humid weather. Overheating can cause serious
health problems.
Humidex and Health Advisories are issued when
the weather is hot enough to cause concern.
Listen for these on local radio and TV stations on
very hot days.
Offer babies under six months more fluids in
hot weather. You can offer water to babies
older than six months and to children. During
hot weather, be sure your toddler takes a
break and has a drink of water often.
Family safety
Overheating
Insect bites
Mosquitos
Mosquito bites are not only itchy and unpleasant,
they can also carry serious illnesses.
The best way to prevent bites is to keep
mosquitos away from your child.
•
Avoid places where there are likely to be lots of mosquitos.
•
Stay inside at dawn, dusk, and early evening. This is when mosquitos are most active.
•
In places where there are likely to be mosquitos, dress in long-sleeved, light-
coloured clothes made from tightly woven fabric.
•
Use mosquito netting around strollers.
Using insect repellent
• Birth to 6 months:
• Do not use insect repellent on babies under 6 months.
there is a good chance that your child could be bitten.
• 6 months to 2 years:
• Use insect repellent only when • Use products labelled 10% DEET •
or less.
Apply insect repellent only once a day. It will protect for about 3 hours.
or less.
• 2 to 12 years:
• Use products labelled 10% DEET •
Family Care
Apply insect repellent no more than 3 times a day. Each
application will protect for about 3 hours.
57
Ticks
The ticks that cause Lyme
disease have been found in New
Brunswick. Only Blacklegged ticks
may carry the bacteria that can
cause Lyme disease.
Photo enlarged
Top row: nymph,
male and female
Blacklegged ticks.
Bottom row: male
and female dog ticks
If you are concerned about ticks,
be sure the insect repellent you
use for yourself and your child
says on the label that it is
effective against ticks.
Cover as much skin as possible when walking, working, or playing in places where ticks are found. Be sure you and your child wear enclosed shoes. Tuck shirts into pants. Tuck pant legs into socks. Dress in light-coloured clothes. This will make it easier to see ticks.
•
Check yourself, your child, and pets after being outdoors in grassy or wooded areas.
Check clothes. Check all parts of the skin—including armpits, groin, and scalp.
If you find a tick, remove it right away.
•
Grasp the tick with tweezers, as close to the skin as possible.
•
Gently and slowly pull the tick straight out. Don’t jerk, twist, or squeeze it.
•
To avoid infections, clean the skin where the tick was attached with soap and water, rubbing alcohol, or hydrogen
peroxide. Contact your health care provider if a rash or flu-like symptoms develop after a tick bite.
58
Added info...
When you use insect repellent:
To protect against ticks:
•
If you find a tick or would like more information
about ticks, contact your health care provider,
or your local Public Health office (contact
information, page 96), call Tele-Care at 811, or
check the Department of Health website on page
94 for a link to the pamphlet, Protect Yourself
Against Lyme Disease.
•
Read the label carefully. Follow the
directions exactly.
•
Do not put repellent on a child’s face and
hands. This makes it less likely that she will
get it in her eyes or mouth. If your child does
get insect repellent in her eyes, rinse with
water.
•
Do not put repellent on sunburns, open
wounds or scraped or scratched skin.
•
•
Apply as little repellent as possible.
•
Apply insect repellent only where there
is lots of fresh air—not in a closed space.
Never use it near food.
•
Wash away the insect repellent with soap
and water when your child no longer needs
to be protected.
Family Care
Apply the repellent on bare skin or on
top of clothing. Never use it under clothing.
Pets
Never leave a baby or small child alone with a
pet in your home or in anyone else’s home. If
you visit a home where there are pets, check with
the pet owner to be sure the home is safe for
children and the pet is comfortable around them.
Talk to your vet about the best way to keep
babies and small children safe around pets.
Your child is much more likely to get salmonella
if there are reptiles in your home. It’s safest to
remove all pet reptiles—like turtles, lizards, and
snakes—from your home.
Wash your hands after handling pets, reptiles,
animal waste, or fish food.
Wash your child’s hands after they play with
animals. Keep cat litter boxes out of reach.
•
•
Close garbage can lids tightly. Easy-
to-open cans attract wild animals.
Family safety
Safety around animals
Teach your child to never touch or pet wild animals or animals he doesn’t know—even if they seem tame or friendly.
•
•
•
Keep wild or stray animals out of your home or cottage.
Never feed wild animals.
Never try to nurse a wild or stray
animal. A sick animal could have rabies.
Bats can carry rabies. See a health care
provider if you or your child have been bitten
by a bat or were in direct contact with a bat’s
saliva or brain tissue.
Wild animals
Wild animals are best enjoyed at a distance.
Keep your child away from them—even those
that seem tame. Don’t encourage your child to
feed wild or stray animals.
Rabies
Rabies is a rare, but very serious, disease that
can be passed to humans—usually through the
bite of an infected animal. If rabies isn’t treated,
it is almost always fatal in both animals and
humans.
If you would like more information about
rabies, contact your local Public Health
office (contact information, page 96) or check
the Department of Health website on page 94
for a link to the pamphlet,
Protect Yourself Against Rabies.
See your health care provider if your child
gets any kind of injury from an animal.
To protect your family from rabies:
•
Get your pets vaccinated. Don’t let pets roam freely where there are wild
animals.
•
Feed your pet inside. If you feed them outside, remove uneaten food as soon as your pet has finished
eating.
Family Care
59
Family food safety
Food safety is important. Food poisoning can make anyone sick. It can make babies and small
children very sick. You can prevent food poisoning by being clean and careful when you handle,
prepare, and store food.
Keep things clean.
Handle food carefully.
Wash your hands for 20 seconds with
soap and warm water:
Thaw food in the refrigerator, not on the
counter. You can also thaw food in the
microwave if you will be cooking it right
away.
•
•
•
Before and after you handle food
•
Wash your kitchen counters with hot water and detergent before and after preparing food. Use paper towels or a clean dishcloth. Change the dishcloth every day.
Wash everything you use to prepare food with detergent and hot water. Rinse them with hot water and let them air dry. Or you can wash them in the dishwasher. This includes
cutting boards, bowls, pots and pans, utensils, can openers, and blenders.
Before you feed your baby or child
Wash all fresh vegetables and fruits
under running water.
Before you eat
Keep your kitchen and everything you
use to prepare food clean.
•
Wash fruit by rubbing it with your hands.
Use a brush to scrub firm vegetables and
fruits—like potatoes, carrots, and melons.
Keep raw eggs, meat, fish, and poultry
away from other foods.
Keep them separate in your shopping cart,
in your refrigerator, and while preparing
food.
•
•
Added info...
For extra protection, you can sanitize your
counters, cutting boards, and utensils with a
mixture of 5 mL (1 teaspoon) of bleach in 750 mL
(3 cups) of water.
•
This is very important after preparing raw meat or
poultry.
Wash your hands, knife, and cutting
board in hot water and detergent after
you cut up raw meat, fish, or poultry.
Do this BEFORE you touch other foods
or use these utensils with other foods.
If you can, use one cutting board for
raw meat, poultry, and fish, and a
different cutting board for foods like
fruits, vegetables, and bread.
Wash plates and bowls that have held
raw meat, poultry, fish, or eggs before
putting any other food in them.
Added info...
You can’t see, smell, or taste the bacteria that
cause food poisoning.
60
Family Care
•
Cook meat and poultry using a meat
thermometer.
•
This includes: fruits and vegetables,
meat, eggs, and dairy foods—like
milk and cheese. Put all raw meats
on the lowest shelf of the fridge. Put
ready-to-eat foods on the shelves
above.
•
Store food in unopened cans and
jars in a cool, dry place.
Safe temperatures are:
• Pork, Veal, Lamb: 71°C (160°F)
• Ground Meat: 71°C (160°F)
• Whole Chicken/Turkey: 82°C (180°F) Store food that can spoil in the
refrigerator.
(Check the temperature in the
thickest part of the thigh without touching a bone.)
• Chicken/Turkey with stuffing: 74°C Don’t use food from cans that are
dented, leaking, or bulging. Don’t
use food from jars with loose or
bulging lids. If you buy a lot of
canned foods at once, write the date
on the can. Use them within 2 years
or before their “best before” date.
Once you’ve opened the can or jar,
store the food in the refrigerator.
•
Serve food as soon as it’s
cooked.
(165°F) (Check the temperature in the centre of the stuffing.)
• Chicken/Turkey pieces: 77°C (170°F)
• Ground Poultry: 74°C (165°F)
• Beef Steaks/Roasts:
63°C (145°F) medium rare
71°C (160°F) medium
77°C (170°F) well done
• Cook eggs and fish all the way through.
• Cook sprouts thoroughly.
It’s not safe to eat raw sprouts because they can’t be washed well enough to remove all the germs.
Added info...
Fruit juice, cider,
milk, and milk
products should be
pasteurized.
•
To find out more
about food safety,
check the references
listed on page 99.
Family Care
Family safety
Store food carefully.
Cook food carefully.
Don’t let leftovers or any kind of
prepared food sit around at room
temperature for longer than 2 hours.
Refrigerate or freeze them right
away.
Keep hot food hot and cold food
cold.
This is especially important when
traveling, or at picnics, buffets, and
barbeques. Use a freezer bag to
keep food cold away from home. If
you have any doubt about whether a
food is safe, don’t eat it.
61
Safe drinking water
Water is the best drink for your child between
meals and snacks. Make sure your water is safe
for your child and family to drink.
Well water
If you get your water from a well be sure to
have it tested before your child drinks it.
If you are not sure that your water is safe, give
your child bottled water.
The New Brunswick Department of Health
recommends that your well water be tested every
6 months for bacteria and every 2 years for
chemical content. A good time to test your well
water is after snowmelt in the spring. You may
also need to test your well water after a flood.
For more information about safe drinking water
and to find out what tests you need, how to do
them, and what the results mean contact your
Regional Health Protection Office. (contact
information, page 95). For information on what to
do if your well is flooded, see the natural
disasters and severe weather information on
the Department of Health website (contact
information, page 94). Do not use water from
roadside or natural springs. This water is not
tested. It is not a safe water supply.
Lead in water
Whether you get your water from a well or a
municipal water supply, if there is lead in your
pipes, pumps, or plumbing, Health Canada
recommends that you let your cold water tap
run for about 5 minutes every morning. This will
flush out lead and copper that could build up in
the water overnight.
Hot water will draw out more lead and other
minerals that may be in your plumbing. Always
use cold tap water for drinking, cooking, filling
your kettle, and mixing formula.
Lead poisoning
Lead-based paint
Lead-based paint is a serious health hazard.
Lead poisoning can cause anemia. It can also
damage the brain and nervous system, resulting
in learning disabilities.
62
If your home was built after 1980, paints used
indoors would be lead free, but there may be
lead in the paint used on the outside.
If your home was built after 1992, both indoor
and outdoor paints will be lead-free.
Lead-based paint is especially dangerous:
•
•
If your home was built before 1960 it is likely that
it has lead-based paint.
When it is chipping or flaking
When it is in a place that a baby can reach or
chew on
If you think there is lead-based paint in your
home, contact your Regional Health Protection
Branch (contact information, page 95).
Family Care
Consumer Product Safety to find out about
any toys that have been recalled because of
high levels of lead (contact information, page
99). Family Resource Centres also often
have information about product recalls
(contact information, page 98).
Lead in toys
Canada has laws that regulate the amount of
lead in children’s toys. You can check with
Life changes—loss and grief
Grief is what you feel when you lose something
you value. Grief is a normal and natural
response to loss.
Everyone feels grief when they lose
something they value. All losses need to
be grieved.
The birth of a baby and the early days and weeks
of parenting can be times of great stress and
intense feelings. You can feel loss, as well as
gain, as you become a parent. There are many
new feelings to deal with. It’s also a time when
old feelings of grief and loss are often stirred up.
It doesn’t help to hide feelings of grief. It
doesn’t help to ignore them and hope they
go away. Grief is a kind of pain that will pop
up later if you try to ignore it. You need to
work through your grief in order to get on
with your life.
Everyone faces loss at some time in their life.
Most of us understand and expect grief when
someone dies. We grieve the death of a loved
one or the loss of a baby through miscarriage,
stillbirth, or SIDS. There is grief at the loss you
feel after an abortion.
It’s important to find healthy ways to express
the grief you feel when you lose someone
or something that’s important to you.
Otherwise, you may take your feelings out
on yourself or others. When people can’t
express the grief they feel, they can become
angry or abusive, abuse alcohol or drugs, or
develop illnesses.
There are lost hopes and dreams when a
relationship breaks down or a family breaks up.
There is a feeling of loss when you find things
don’t work out the way you planned or hoped—
for example, when a baby is born prematurely
or has medical problems or disabilities.
When you lose a job, when a pet dies, or when
you move away from friends, or friends move
away from you, you suffer a loss.
Family safety Life changes—loss and grief
For more information on lead-based paints,
contact Health Canada (contact information,
page 99).
Talking with friends, family, elders, or
community or spiritual leaders can help. You
can call the provincial Helpline for
information about resources in your
community. Talk with a health care provider
if you think you need professional help to
deal with grief.
Family Care
63
Helping small children handle grief
Babies and small children feel loss and grief too.
They feel grief when they lose or are separated
from someone they are attached to—like a
parent, grandparent, brother or sister, or
caregiver.
You can help your baby or small child through
grief by being there. Spend extra time with your
child. Offer lots of loving care—rocking, hugging,
cuddling. Be patient. Talk with her about what is
happening.
Babies and small children don’t understand why
people they are attached to are no longer a part
of their life. They don’t understand about death
or separation. They don’t understand why a
parent isn’t around anymore. They don’t
understand why you have moved away from
Grandpa. They don’t understand why the
caregiver they like is no longer at daycare.
But they feel grief at the loss.
It also helps to stick to your child’s routines for
eating, sleeping, and playing so that the rest of
her life is as normal as possible.
Talk with a health care provider if you are
concerned about how your child is dealing with
grief.
Change is difficult for small children and they
feel the loss that change can bring as grief.
Babies and small children can’t tell you how they
feel. They show grief by:
•
•
Having problems eating or sleeping
•
•
•
•
Being fussy or very quiet
Acting younger than their age—for example,
toddlers who have been toilet trained may
start wetting their pants again
Throwing tantrums
Being very clingy, fearful, or insecure
Being very difficult to soothe
For information on helping your child deal with
separation or divorce, see “When parents don’t
live together,” page 22.
64
Family Care
Values
Our values are beliefs that we learn as children.
Values can change as we grow and develop.
They guide us in the choices we make and how
we live our life.
Our values are shaped by our family, our culture,
our religion, our spiritual beliefs, our community,
and our experiences.
You can have values about many things:
•
•
•
•
•
parenting with a partner, sharing parenting,
or living with other adults, it’s important that
you talk together about your values and work
out what you want to share with your
children. Ask yourself:
•
What are the values you learned from
your family when you were growing up?
Which of these are still important to you?
Are there any you’d like to change?
•
What are the values you’d like your
children to have?
How you treat other people
•
What can you do to encourage these
values?
How you think children should be raised
How important material things are to you
Once you’ve worked out your values—either
on your own or with others—be confident
that you have the ability to share them with
your children.
The importance of family
Relationships between partners
Sharing your values with your children is part of
being a parent.
The first step in sharing your values with your
children is to have a strong and loving bond with
them. Children learn the most from the people
they care most about and are most strongly
attached to. Building this bond of love and
attachment starts at birth.
As a parent, you have the closest bond with your
children. You are their most important teacher.
You share your values with your children by living
those values every day. Children follow your
example—they are more likely to copy what you
do than to copy what you say. If you respect
others, your children will learn from your
example to treat others this way.
Parents are teaching their children values all the
time—whether they know it or not. If you are
It’s also a good idea to talk about values with
everyone who takes care of your child. It’s
important that they all know the values you
would like to see in your child’s daily life.
Added info...
In a multi-racial and multi-cultural society, it’s
important that children know about, and feel
good about, all parts of their heritage.
If you have adopted a child from another race
or culture, it is important that you help her
learn about and be proud of both your values
and traditions and the traditions of her own
race or culture.
If your child is biracial, it’s important that he
feels connected to and proud of both parts of
his identity.
Family Care
Life changes—loss and grief Sharing your values and traditions with your children
Sharing your values and traditions with your children
65
Traditions
Added info...
Traditions are customs or practices that are
passed down in families. Story time and bedtime
routines, holidays and celebrations, and songs
and games are a few of the kinds of traditions
that are passed along in families.
Positive values—like honesty, kindness, and
helpfulness—can make a family strong and help
children grow and learn.
But unhealthy values—like a belief that hitting a
child or another family member is okay—can hurt
the entire family.
Every culture and religion has beliefs and stories
that can be scary for children. Be thoughtful
about how you introduce these ideas, stories,
and traditions to your child.
There are community resources available to help
families understand and develop healthy values.
Contact a Family Resource Centre (contact
information, page 98), or health care provider if
you have concerns about the values your children
are learning.
Families have different traditions. If you are
parenting with a partner or sharing parenting,
it’s important for you to talk about and decide
on the traditions and practices that will be good
for your baby and family. You may want to start
some traditions of your own!
Family violence
Family violence is abuse that happens in a family
or other close relationship. Abuse can happen
in any kind of family. The people most often
abused are women, children, and the elderly.
If you are being abused, you should know
that:
•
Abuse can happen at any time, but it often
starts—or gets worse—during and soon after
pregnancy.
The abuse is NEVER your fault. You do
NOT deserve it.
•
•
NO ONE has the right to abuse you.
•
Physical and sexual assault are crimes.
It’s also a crime to threaten physical or
sexual abuse.
•
You are not alone. There are people
who can help you.
If you are being abused, you may feel afraid.
You may feel helpless and worthless. You may
feel like a failure. You may think that it’s all your
fault. These feelings can make it hard to look for
help.
66
Children are hurt by seeing or hearing
abuse in their family. This is true even if
they are not physically abused
themselves.
Family Care
You can also look for help and support in your
community. Try:
•
•
•
•
•
Women’s shelters or transition houses
(contact information, page 100)
•
•
•
•
Legal aid
Counseling services
Clergy
Medical services
Whatever you decide to do, your safety and
your children’s safety are what matter most.
You’ll find more information about what to
do if you are being abused in Ending Abuse
in Your Relationship, a booklet from the
Women’s Equality Branch of the Executive
Council Office (contact information, page 100).
Tele-Care by calling 811
Police
Support groups
Domestic abuse intervention programs for
men
Abuse can be physical, sexual, emotional,
verbal, or financial.
Added info...
It is abuse if anyone:
Child abuse is a crime.
It is child abuse:
•
•
Added info...
When someone hurts a child. Child abuse
can be physical—hitting, shaking, or other
injuries. Abuse can be sexual, verbal, or
emotional. Neglect—not taking care of a
child—can be abuse. It is abuse if a child
sees or hears others being abused.
When a parent doesn’t protect their child
from another person’s abuse.
The law says that if you know or think that a child
is being abused, you must report it to the police
or to Child Protection Services (contact
information, page 94).
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
If you have a good reason for thinking a child is
being abused, but it turns out you’re wrong, you
won’t get into trouble for reporting abuse.
Family Care
Scares or threatens you
Yells at you
Calls you names
Hits or hurts you physically
Throws or breaks things
Stops you from seeing your family or
friends
Demands sex
Questions everything you do
Tries to control everything you do
Controls all the money and family
finances
Tells you the abuse is your fault
Sharing your values and traditions with your children Family violence
If you are being abused, you will need help and
support to work out what you want to do. Talking
to someone you trust is a good first step. When
you look for support, you are entitled to service
that doesn’t judge you and that respects your
needs.
Threatens to hurt or kill people or pets
you care about
67
Brothers and Sisters
A little baby makes big changes.........................69
Helping children get along together....................70
Sibling rivalry..................................................71
68
Brothers and Sisters
No matter what the age of your other child—or
children—a new baby makes big changes in her
life. It can take time for a brother or sister to get
used to it all.
Children can think, “Everyone is always too busy
to play. Mommy is always tired. Everyone makes
a fuss over the baby. The baby gets presents
and I don’t. Someone is always telling me to be
quiet or I’ll wake the baby. It’s no fun at all!”
Bonding with a new baby takes time for brothers
and sisters, just as it can take time for parents.
Children who feel loved themselves will find it
much easier to love their new baby.
To make it easier for other children:
•
Talk to them about babies while you’re
still pregnant.
Tell them how little and helpless babies are.
Tell them about all the things they can do
because they’re big now. Look in libraries
(contact information, page 99) for children’s
books about new babies.
•
Bring them something when you bring the
baby home.
This could be a small gift or a book from the
library. Young children may like their own
baby doll to bathe, dress, and take care of.
•
Be patient.
Never leave a small child alone with a
baby. Children don’t know how easily a
baby can be hurt.
Teach your children some rules for baby
safety:
•
•
•
Always be very gentle.
•
Don’t give the baby any toys without
checking with a grown-up.
Only grown-ups can pick the baby up.
Never put anything in the baby’s nose,
eyes, mouth, or ears.
A little baby makes big changes
A little baby makes big changes
Small children may begin to act like a baby
again. This is normal and will pass. Keep
your children’s routine as normal as possible.
Give them time to get used to the changes a
new baby brings. Show them that you love
them just the way they are.
Brothers and Sisters
69
Helping children get along together
Your toddler may be learning to get along with a
new baby. Your older children may be learning
to get along with your toddler.
•
Toddlers have a right to toys of their own and
babies need to be safe from toys that could
hurt. Toddlers also need some time to play
without being bothered. When children share
a play space, this can call for some planning.
You can:
• Have toddlers do things like puzzles, • Give toddlers a special shelf or cupboard • Play with the baby while toddlers are •
Help toddlers learn ways to get along with
a baby.
Show toddlers how to “trade” toys with a
baby. When the baby grabs a toy, show
them that offering another toy works better
than just grabbing it back. Another approach
is to help toddlers to wait a few minutes and
watch what the baby does. Most of the time,
the baby will lose interest in the toy very
quickly and the toddler can get it back
without fuss. Toddlers are just beginning to
learn patience and cooperation, so you may
have to show your toddler these things many
times.
Getting used to a crawling baby
Older children are often fine with a new baby until
the baby starts to crawl or move around on his
own. Suddenly, little hands are grabbing toys,
knocking over blocks, and ruining games.
A baby’s new ability to move around may upset
an older child, but it can also be a risk for the
baby. Toys that are safe for an older child may
be dangerous for a younger one—especially if
the baby is at the age where everything goes into
his mouth.
This is a difficult time for a toddler. To help make
it easier:
•
•
70
Respect your toddler’s feelings.
Listen when he tells you how upset he is. Let
him know that you understand. Let him know
that it’s okay to be angry and to say so. But
it’s not okay to hit or hurt when you’re angry.
Don’t expect a toddler to share.
Toddlers are just beginning to understand
things like playing nicely together and
cooperation. They don’t really understand
sharing until they are about 4 or 5. Even
then, it’s hard to do. Learning to share can
take a long time.
Look for ways to use play space fairly.
colouring, and playing with small toys on the kitchen table or some other place where a baby can’t reach.
where they can keep toys that the baby shouldn’t touch. Help toddlers learn to put their toys away when they’re not
playing with them.
playing to give them some peace.
Brothers and Sisters
Find things children can do together.
•
Never expect a toddler to look after
another child.
A crawling baby needs an adult watching at
all times. Toddlers shouldn’t be playing alone
where you can’t keep an eye on them, either.
Leaving them alone together isn’t safe.
Added info...
For example, you can help them make music
together. The baby can shake a rattle while
toddlers play a drum or ring a bell. Or you
can all build towers for the baby to knock
down.
What you say and do is important because
it has a big impact on how your children feel
about themselves and each other.
Remember: Your children may not
remember what you say. They may not
remember what you do. But they’ll never
forget how you make them feel.
Sibling rivalry
Living with brothers and sisters isn’t always easy.
But children learn a lot from one another. They
learn to share, to get along, and to solve
problems.
These lessons take time. When your children
are small, it’s up to you to help them learn to live
together. Your children will be brothers and
sisters for the rest of their lives. Help them get
off to a good start.
•
Include your children in helping to care for
a baby.
If your children want to help you with the
baby, let them. Talk about what a baby needs
and how they can help. Even young toddlers
can help by bringing you a diaper when you
change the baby. An older child can talk to
the baby while you’re changing a diaper. Or
tell a story while the baby is breastfeeding.
Praise your children when they’re being
helpful.
Giving older children these kinds of little jobs around the home can help them feel
important in the family. Make sure there is no chance that a brother or sister could hurt the baby, even by mistake.
Helping older toddlers to understand what the baby needs can help them be patient. For example, “The baby will need a nap this afternoon, but we can go to the park when she wakes up.”
•
Spend some special time every day
with each of your children.
Talk to them. Listen to them. Play with
them. Do something they enjoy—play a
game, go for a walk, read a book. Even if
it’s only a few minutes, it can make a big
difference to your child. This isn’t always
easy to do, but it’s very important that
each child knows that you love her.
When there’s a new baby in the family, your older children need to know that you Brothers and Sisters
Helping children get along together Sibling rivalry
•
71
still love them and that they’re still special to you. Help them feel good about themselves. This is especially important for an older child who is missing all the time you had together before the new baby came along.
•
Give each child lots of love and affection.
Make sure that each child gets lots of hugs,
kisses, cuddles, and snuggles. All brothers
and sisters have times when they don’t get
along. But they’ll be more likely to get along
at least some of the time if they are sure that
you love them all equally.
•
Show your children how to get along
together.
72
Children learn by watching what you do.
When you play with your children, say
“Please” and “Thank you.” Show them how
to cooperate and take turns. They may be
too young to actually do any of this yet, but
as they get older, they will remember these
lessons. It’s also important that your children
see you and your partner, or other adults,
solving their problems and arguments in
ways that are polite and respectful. If your
own disagreements involve yelling or door
slamming, your children will behave the
same way.
•
Don’t compare children.
Find things to admire and praise in each of
your children—how polite they are, how well
they draw, how fast they run. But avoid
saying things like, “Why can’t you be quiet
like your brother?”
Brothers and Sisters
Sibling rivalry
Brothers and Sisters
73
Grandparents
Grandparents are learning too...........................75
74
68
Grandparents
If this is your first baby, your parents will be
learning to be grandparents while you’re learning
to be a parent.
You have to work out what kind of parent you’ll
be. They have to work out what kind of
grandparents they’ll be.
Some grandparents want to spend lots of time
with their grandchildren. Others don’t. Some
want to babysit. Others don’t. Some are full of
advice about how you should parent. Others are
happy to let you learn on your own.
Grandparents are learning too
Grandparents are learning too
If you get along well with your parents, this can
be a happy time.
If you and your parents have different ideas
about raising children, it can be very stressful.
Our understanding about what’s healthy and safe
for children has changed a lot since your parents
were raising you. Many of the things you do as a
parent will be different from what they did. Talk
to your parents to help them understand what
you are doing and why. Share your values about
parenting with them.
Be polite, but be clear. You are the parent. It’s
up to you to decide how to care for your baby.
Added info...
Be sure that your parents know not to smoke
around your children, either at home or in the
car.
Children should never travel in any car,
truck, or van unless they are in a car seat.
This includes grandparents’ cars. Be sure
that grandparents have the right car seat
for your child’s age and size and that it is
properly installed in the car. You’ll find
more information on how to choose and
install car seats in Be Safe and Keep Kids
Safe: A Parent’s Guide to Car Seats.
You’ll find a copy in the “Resources”
section in the back of this book.
Grandparents
75
Leaving your child with other caregivers. . . . 78
Going back to work or school. . . . . . . . . . . . 80
Finding quality childcare . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 81
76
Other Caregivers
Other Caregivers
Leaving your child with other caregivers
Whether or not you plan to return to work or
school while your children are still small, sooner
or later you’ll need to leave your baby or toddler
with another caregiver. Every parent needs a
break once in a while!
Starting sometime around age 6 months, most
babies and toddlers begin to understand how
important you are to them. They don’t want to
let you out of their sight. This can make it very
difficult for both of you when you have to leave
your child with a babysitter or other caregiver.
Long before you have to leave him, help your
child get used to the idea that he can trust
others to care for him and that he can trust you
to return.
•
Help him learn that you always come
back.
Some babies and toddlers need to see or
touch you to feel safe. Try playing peek-aboo or hiding games to help your child
understand that when he can’t see you, you
are still there and will always come back. For
example, hide behind a sofa or door for a few
seconds and say, “Where’s Mommy?” several
times. Then pop out and say, “Here she is!”
Over time, increase the length of time you
hide to a minute or so. You can also let your
child be the one who hides.
78
Spend time with him. Give him lots of love
and attention. Let him know that he’s
important to you. Help him learn to do things
for himself. Praise him when he does well.
The more secure your child feels, the easier it
will be for him to let you go for a little while.
When you leave your child with
another caregiver:
•
Let your child spend some time with the
caregiver before you leave.
It may be worthwhile to hire the sitter to
spend an hour or two with your child while
you’re there too. This will give them time
to get to know one another. It will also give
you a chance to show the sitter around your
home. He or she will need to know things
like where your child sleeps, where food and
clothing are kept, where the exits are, and
how to lock the doors. It will also give you
a chance to see how the caregiver reacts to
your child.
•
Stay calm and relaxed.
• Help him get used to other adults.
Try to bring lots of other people into your
child’s life—friends, relatives, neighbours—
so that he starts to feel comfortable with
different people.
•
Help your child feel secure.
If you show that you are upset and worried
about leaving, your child will feel it and
become more upset.
•
Don’t sneak out.
Tell your child when you’re leaving. Give him
a hug and kiss. Tell him you love him and that
you’ll be back soon. Let him wave
good-bye—even if he’s crying. Smile and
wave back.
Other Caregivers
Expect tears.
Your child would rather you didn’t leave. He’ll
show it by clinging and crying. Be patient.
Stay calm.
Added info...
Finding a babysitter to care for your
children occasionally
•
Leave a list for the caregiver. He or she
will need to know things like:
• Where you’ll be and how to reach you
Finding someone you trust to care for
your children while you go out isn’t
always easy.
• Who to call in an emergency
• Ask friends, family and neighbours for
• Bedtimes and bedtime rituals
• Favourite toys and games
• What and how to feed your child
• How to calm your child if he cries
suggestions.
• Check with local junior and senior
high schools. Teachers and
guidance counselors may know
students who want to baby sit.
• Check with local youth groups or
• Information about any allergies or medical
conditions
church groups.
Ask the sitter for the names of other
families he or she has worked for. Call
and ask if they are happy with the sitter.
Leaving your child with other caregivers
•
In some communities, teens can take
babysitting classes from community
agencies. You may feel more
comfortable leaving your child with
someone who’s had this training.
Other Caregivers
79
Going back to work or school
Many parents feel conflicting emotions as the
time nears for them to return to work or school.
For example, you may need to return to work
because you need the income, but find the
thought of leaving your baby every day hard to
bear. Or you might be happy to be going back
to school or work, but wonder how this will affect
your baby’s development.
Whether you stay at home or return to work
or school is a decision you have to make for
yourself. What you do will be based on what
you and your family need.
Research shows that children can do well both
in families where a parent stays home with them
and in families where others care for them while
their parent—or parents—work outside the home.
What matters is that children have consistent,
good quality childcare, as well as time and love
from their parents.
Planning a return to work or school
Returning to work or school is a big change for
you and for your child. Planning ahead can help
make the change easier for everyone.
Before you return to work or school
80
•
If you have freezer space, make double or
triple size batches when you cook. Freeze
the extras for busy days.
•
Start your child in childcare a week or two
before you return to work or school.
This will give your child a chance to get used
to childcare. You may find that it helps to
stay with her for the first day. Then leave her
there for longer each day. Many programs
have a routine to gradually introduce children
to their centre.
Don’t be surprised—or too upset—if your child cries when you leave. In fact, you may find that she cries more each day for the first week or so. Some children don’t start to cry until the second or third week. Your child cries because she starts to understand that you’re going to leave her. Be patient and consistent. Your child will slowly settle into the new routine.
Starting childcare early will also give you a chance to work out morning routines and
figure out how much time you’ll need to get everyone ready each day.
On work or school days
•
Do as much as you can the night before or
before your child gets up in the
morning.
For example, pick out clothes for you and
your child. Get breakfast ready. Pack
lunches, diaper bags, or whatever you
need to take to work or school.
•
Leave lots of time to get ready in the
morning.
Small children can take quite a while to get
up and get dressed, especially when they
want to do everything for themselves. The
more you try to rush them, the slower they
get. Set the alarm early enough to allow
plenty of time so no one starts the day
feeling rushed or stressed.
Other Caregivers
•
Pick up your child on time.
Your child should be able to depend on you.
If you’re going to be late, make sure you
contact the childcare staff or your caregiver.
•
Develop an evening routine.
spend with your child. Do something
you both like—cuddle up with a book,
walk around the block, have a warm
bath. Whatever helps calm everyone
down.
If your child is hungry, give her a healthy
snack while you get dinner. Spending
this time with your child will make it
easier for her to cooperate while you get
dinner.
Added info...
Many parents find that coming home from
work can also be very stressful—you’re
tired, your child is tired, chores are waiting,
laundry needs to be done, dinner needs to be
cooked. It can be helpful to have some
routines for this time of day, too. For
example, you could set aside a little time to
You’ll find information about continuing
to breastfeed while working or going to
school in Breastfeeding Your Baby.
You can get a copy from your local
Public Health office (contact
information, page 96).
Finding quality childcare
Look for childcare early!
If you are thinking about childcare for your new
baby or for your older children, start looking long
before you think you’ll need it.
In New Brunswick, childcare can be regulated or
unregulated.
Regulated childcare
Regulated childcare can be offered in approved
child day care centres or in approved community
daycare homes.
Going back to work or school Finding quality childcare
• Develop a morning routine.
Children find routines very reassuring.
Getting up, getting washed and dressed, and
eating breakfast in the same way every day
lets your child know what to expect. Try not
to make TV part of your morning routine. For
more information, see “Screen time,” page
52.
Regulated childcare centres and community
day care homes must offer children a
program that is right for their age and that will
support their growth and development.
They must have clear policies for
parents that outline things such as:
•
•
•
The fees they charge parents
How they handle dropping off and
picking up children
Their approach to child development and
care
Other Caregivers
81
They must follow rules about:
•
•
•
•
•
•
Approved child daycare centres
The number of children they care for
The number of adults caring for the children
Staff training
The kinds of food they feed the children
Programs they offer
General health and safety practices
There are a limited number of regulated
childcare spaces—especially for infants—and
they fill up fast. You’ll need time to find out
what’s available where you live.
There are about 743 licensed childcare centres
in New Brunswick. Most of these accept children
18 months or older. A few offer care to infants.
In New Brunswick all child daycare centres
are regulated and must be approved. To get
approved, they must meet the requirements
of the Day Care Regulations under the Family
Services Act.
The Department of Education and Early
Childhood Development inspects all approved
child daycare centres every year.
Added info...
Parents may be able to get government subsidies
to help them pay for regulated childcare services.
Contact your local Social Development Regional
office (contact information, page 95) to find out if
you are eligible for the childcare subsidy program.
You’ll find a list of approved child day care centres
and community day care homes on the Department
of Education and Early Childhood Development
website (Contact information page 94).
Approved community day care homes
In New Brunswick, the Department of Education
and Early Childhood Development approves
community day care homes and they are
inspected every year.
To be approved, a community day care home
must meet all requirements that are set out in the
Day Care Regulations under the Family Services
Act.
82
Other Caregivers
Unregulated childcare is another option. When
children under age 5 are present, a person may
legally provide care in the home for up to 4
children. This number includes the caregiver’s
own children and does not increase if more than
one caregiver is present. If you are concerned
about the number of children in the home,
contact the Department of Education and Early
Childhood Development (contact information,
page 94).
Unregulated childcare is often offered by a
relative, friend, or neighbour. An unregulated
caregiver may have training in early childhood
education, but this is not required.
Some unregulated caregivers have policies for
parents to follow and offer good programs for the
children. However, they are not required to do
Added info...
Added info...
Most children cry a bit when they start
childcare. It’s their way of protesting this
change in their life. This is normal and
usually passes quickly.
However, some kinds of behaviour may
be cause for concern. Talk with the
caregiver if your child:
•
•
•
Continues to cry every morning
Begins to behave in ways that are
different from usual
If you’re not happy with your caregiver’s
response:
•
You’ll find more information about finding
and choosing quality childcare on the
Department of Education and Early Childhood
Development website (contact information,
page 94), or from a Family Resource Centre.
Seems consistently unhappy
Finding quality childcare
Unregulated childcare
•
Spend some time at the childcare
home or centre. Watch what goes
on. Drop in for lunch. Drop in at
different times during the day.
Talk with other parents to see if they
share your concerns.
If you still have questions, call the
Department of Education and Early
Childhood Development (contact
information, page 94).
If you have any reason to think that your
child—or another child—is being abused,
you must report it to Child Protection
Services (contact information, page
94). You can speak with a social worker
without giving your name.
Other Caregivers
83
Choosing childcare
Quality childcare—whether it is regulated or
not—should offer children a happy and safe
place to play, grow, and learn.
Childcare in your home
If you plan to hire someone to care for your
child in your home, get to know the caregiver
in advance. Spend some time together in your
home. This will allow both you and your child
to get to know the caregiver. It will give you a
chance to tell him or her about your routines
and what you expect.
Always ask for a list of references to contact
before hiring a person to provide childcare in
your home.
Childcare outside your home
Whether you are considering care in a centre
or in the caregiver’s home, arrange to visit in
advance. Get an idea of the daily routines and
activities being offered. Look at how children
and adults treat one another. Try to get a feel
for whether or not it’s the kind of childcare you’re
looking for.
Take a notepad and pen when you visit. Write
down your thoughts about the visit. Note any
questions or concerns that you would like to
discuss in more detail with the caregiver. Talk
with other parents whose children have been
cared for in the home or centre.
Here are a few things to think about when choosing either REGULATED or
UNREGULATED childcare outside your home:
•
•
Is the home or centre warm and welcoming?
•
Is it clear who is in charge and who you
should speak to when you have questions or
concerns?
•
•
Is it well-organized, clean, and safe for the
children?
How do the caregivers treat each other?
How many children are present? Are there
enough adults to meet the needs of the
children?
•
•
Do the caregivers speak to the children
kindly? Do they seem to like and care about
the children? Do they know the children’s
names?
How do the caregivers handle behaviour
issues?
84
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
What do the children do all day? Is there a
daily routine?
Do the activities include indoor and outdoor
play? Active play and quiet play? Are there
lots of different toys and activities?
Are outdoor play areas clean and safe?
Are there animals in the home or centre or
nearby—for example, in the next yard?
Are there activities for children of different
ages?
Can the children make their own play choices
both indoors and outside?
Are the children playing and enjoying
themselves?
•
Are the meals and snacks nutritious? Are
they offered to the children in a respectful
way?
Other Caregivers
Does the home or centre reflect and
welcome the different cultures, races,
abilities, and families of the children in
your community?
•
How does the home or centre support
children learning to use the toilet?
•
Does the home or centre use New
Brunswick’s Early Learning and Child
Care Curriculum?
If you are considering UNREGULATED childcare, ask these questions, too
All of these things are taken care of in approved
child daycare centres and approved community
day care homes.
• Who will be caring for your child? What
experience and training do they have? Do
they have first aid and CPR training? Have
they been screened through the Department
of Social Development’s Prior Contact and
Criminal Record checks? Have any other
adults in the home been screened through
these checks?
•
•
•
How much does it cost?
Will you get tax receipts for childcare fees?
How are parents involved? Are there regular
meetings? Will you get an update about your
child every day?
Ask yourself
Would you feel good about leaving your
child here?
Would your child be happy here?
•
•
•
•
•
Will you get a written copy of the rules
and policies? For example, what if your
child gets sick? What if you’re late
picking her up? What about holidays?
What if the caregiver gets sick?
Finding quality childcare
•
Can you visit whenever you like?
Does anyone in the home smoke?
Are there toilets and sinks close to
where the children play?
If the day care home uses well water, is
the water tested regularly? (See page
62 for information on water safety.)
Added info...
Once you find care for your child, be an
active participant.
• Go to parent meetings.
• Look at the information posted on the
parent board.
• Drop in for visits.
Other Caregivers
85
Thanks!...........................................................88
86
Thanks!
Support and
Information
Thanks!
Thanks!
The Nova Scotia Department of Health and
Wellness acknowledges—with thanks!—the
many people whose commitment and concern for
Nova Scotia’s mothers, babies, and families have
shaped this book. Your advice, insight, support
and hard work have made this book
possible.
•
In particular, we’d like to thank the Parent Health
Education Resource Working Group whose work
has been at the heart of Loving Care.
Special thanks to the many people who, over
the years, have contributed to the development
or revision of the Loving Care books.
Parent Health Education Resource
Working Group (2008–2011)
Kim Arcon, Community Home Visitor, South West Nova, Annapolis Valley, and South Shore District Health Authorities
•
Jennifer Macdonald, (Co-chair), Provincial Health Educator, Department of Health and Wellness
•
Kathy Inkpen, Family Health Coordinator, Department of Health and Wellness
•
Bonnie Anderson, Public Health Nutritionist, Capital Health
•
Susan DeWolf, Family Support Worker, Extra Support for Parents Volunteer Service, IWK Health Centre
•
Natasha Horne, Community Program Coordinator, Dartmouth Family Centre
•
Sherry MacDonald, Public Health Nurse, Guysborough Antigonish Strait & Cape Breton District Health Authorities
•
Vicki MacLean, Public Health Nurse, Colchester East Hants & Pictou County District Health Authorities
•
Kathy Penny, Public Health Nurse, Capital Health
•
Trudy Reid, Public Health Nutritionist, Cumberland Health Authority
88
Annette Ryan, Perinatal Nurse Consultant, Reproductive Care Program of Nova Scotia
•
Tina Swinamer, Coordinator, Early Childhood Nutrition, Department of Health and Wellness
•
Shelley Wilson, Public Health Nutritionist, South West Nova District Health Authority
•
•
Sue Arsenault, Public Health Nurse, Colchester, East Hants, Cumberland, and Pictou County Health Authorities
•
Rose Couch, Early Childhood Coordinator, Department of Health and Wellness
•
Alice de la Durantaye, Community Outreach Worker, South West Nova District Health Authority
•
Shelley Thompson, Coordinator, Child Care Centres Policy & Program Development, Department of Community Services
•
Sarah Melanson, Early Childhood Consultant, Public Health Services, Capital Health
•
Shannon O’Neill, Public Health Dental Hygienist, Public Health Services, Capital Health
•
•
Amy MacAulay, Early Childhood Coordinator, Public Health Services, Capital Health
Renée Hartleib, Writer/Editor/Researcher, and parents of the Rainbow Playtime group
Thanks!
•
•
Marika Lathem, Early Childhood Development, Community Outreach Specialist, Department of Community Services
Parent’s Place Family Resource Centre, Yarmouth
•
Alana Baxter, Program Administration Officer, Family and Youth Services, Department of Community Services
•
Fran Gorman, Public Health Nurse, Public Health Services, South Shore, South West, and Annapolis Valley District Health Authorities
•
Kids First Family Resource Centre, Guysborough
•
•
Maggie’s Place Family Resource Centre, Truro
Maggie’s Place Family Resource Centre, Amherst
•
Rita MacAulay, Public Health Nutritionist, Public Health Services, Capital Health
Supportive Housing for Young Mothers Advisory Board, Halifax
•
•
Donna Malone, Program Consultant, Community Action Program for Children (CAPC) and Prenatal Nutrition Program (CPNP), Public Health Agency of Canada
East Preston Family Resource Centre, East Preston
•
•
•
•
•
Native Council of Nova Scotia, Liverpool
King Street Family Resource, a site of South Shore Family Resource Association, Shelburne
Deanna MacDonald, Regional Prevention Coordinator, New Glasgow District office, Department of Community Services
Parents and Home Visitors from the Healthy Beginnings Enhanced Home Visiting Program across Nova Scotia
Darlene MacInnis, Regional Prevention Coordinator, Eastern Regional office, Department of Community Services
We also offer special thanks to the many
public health and community partners who
have contributed to the development of this
resource.
Pauline Raven, Photo Consultant
Geneviève Flynn, Resource Specialist, Department of Health and Wellness
•
Michelle Newman, Resource Specialist, Department of Health and Wellness
Expert Reviewers
Focus Groups
We are especially grateful to the many parents
who participated in the focus groups that
reviewed the various drafts of Loving Care: Parents
and Families. Their generosity in sharing their
experiences and ideas has contributed greatly to
this resource.
•
Dartmouth Family Centre, Dartmouth
•
•
•
•
Cape Breton Family Place, Sydney
Thanks!
•
ESP (Extra Support for Parents) Group, Bayers Westwood Family Resource Centre, Halifax
We thank our reviewers for giving generously
of their time and expertise in reviewing this
book or a portion of this book.
•
Michelle Amero, Healthy Eating Coordinator, Department of Health and Wellness
•
Heather Christian, Director of Healthy Development Responsibility Centre, Department of Health and Wellness
Thanks!
89
•
Teri Cole, Communicable Disease Prevention and Control Coordinator, Department of Health and Wellness
•
•
Janelle Comeau, Directrice du département des professions de la santé, Coordonnatrice du Baccalauréat en service social, Université Sainte-Anne
•
Michelle LeDrew, Health Promotion Manager and National Baby Friendly Initiative Assessor Candidate, Public Health Services, Capital Health
Confederacy of Mainland Mi’kmaq, Catherine Knockwood, Maternal Child Health Program Coordinator, for coordinating a review by member communities
Joanne MacDonald, M.D., Clinical Director, Reproductive Mental Health, IWK Health Services
•
• Sharon Davis Murdoch, Special Advisor to the Associate Deputy Minister on Diversity and Social Inclusion, Department of Health and Wellness
•
•
Steve Machat, Manager, Tobacco Control, Department of Health and Wellness
•
Beverley Madill, Community Health Nurse, Potlotek Health Centre, Chapel Island
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
Carolyn d’Entremont, Executive Director, Maggie’s Place (Cumberland)
Maren Dietze, Registered Midwife (RM UK) BA
Christine Ellsworth, Psychologist, Preschool Pediatric Program, IWK Health Centre
Mary Anne Fraser, Coordinator Children in Care, Department of Community Services
•
Doris Gillis, Ph.D. Candidate, University of Nottingham, CIHR Fellow, Associate Professor, Department of Human Nutrition,
St. Francis Xavier University
Heather McKay, Health Promotion Specialist, Child Safety Link, IWK Health Centre
Patricia Millar, Volunteer La Leche League Canada Leader, Dartmouth, Nova Scotia
Dee Mombourquette, Communicable Disease Prevention and Control Coordinator, Department of Health and Wellness
Gary Moulton, Food Safety Inspector, Department of Agriculture
Shelley Goodwin, Registered Psychologist,
Yarmouth Mental Health Services, South West
Nova District Health Authority
•
Monica Gosbee, Site-Coordinator, King Street Family Resource (a site of South Shore Family Resource Association), Shelburne, and
facilitator of Crossroads of Parenting and Divorce (A purchased program from Active Parenting Publishers)
•
Hillary Marentette, Volunteer Doula Coordinator, Single Parent Centre, Spryfield
•
•
Krista Jangaard, M.D., Neonatal Co-director, Nova Scotia Reproductive Care Program
90
Charlotte Jesty, Mijua’jij Aqq Ni’n Coordinator, Unama’ki Maternal Child Health Program, Eskasoni
•
Kim Mundle, Car Seat Safety Specialist, Child Safety Link, IWK Health Centre
•
Tanya Poulette, Community Health Nurse, Membertou Wellness Centre
•
Judith Purcell, Prevention Coordinator, Cancer Care Nova Scotia
•
Thanks!
Melissa Reede, Outreach Worker, Juniper House, South West Nova Transition House Association, Yarmouth, and facilitator of Crossroads of Parenting and Divorce (A
purchased program from Active Parenting Publishers)
Dan Steeves, Nicotine Specialist, Capital Addiction Services
•
Gaynor Watson-Creed, M.D., Medical Officer of Health, Public Health Services, Capital Health
•
Tracey Williams, M.D., Pediatric Physician, Colchester East Hants District Health Authority
Victoria General Hospital (Farmers’ Market)
Village of Chester Public Beach
Other photo acknowledgements
Thanks!
•
Photo of ticks courtesy of Robbin Lindsay,
Public Health Agency of Canada
Photo of a mosquito courtesy of the U.S.
Centers for Disease Control and
Prevention’s Public Health Image Library
Families Volunteering for Photo Shoots
We are especially grateful to the Nova Scotian
families whose photos appear in this book. Your
bright and beautiful children make this book
special.
For on-site photo shoots, special thanks to all the
families who graciously opened their homes, and
to several organizations and public places:
Alderney Gate Public Library
Cole Harbour Place
Cyclesmith
Dartmouth Family Resource Centre
East Preston Day Care Centre
Halifax Central Library
Halifax Grupo de Capoeira
Halifax Osteopathic Health Centre
Halifax Waterfront
Izaak Walton Killam (IWK) Health Centre
Maritime Museum of the Atlantic
Parade Square
Peter Green Hall Children’s Centre
Planet Organic Market
Point Pleasant Park
Porters’ Point
Radisson Suite Hotel Halifax
Supportive Housing for Young Mothers
Taproot Farms
The Discovery Centre
The Public Gardens
Thanks!
91
Provincial Services........................... 94
Other Resources and Services................. 97
• Child Protection Services................................... 94
• Autism Agencies.................................................. 97
• Addiction Services............................................... 94
• Department of Education and
Early Childhood Development............................ 94
• Department of Health........................................... 94
• Department of Social Development................... 95
• First Nation Community Health Centres............ 95
• Healthy Environments......................................... 95
• Healthy Smiles, Clear Vision............................... 95
• Mental Health Centres......................................... 95
• New Brunswick Courts........................................ 96
• New Brunswick’s Family Law
Information Centre............................................... 96
• New Brunswick Fetal Alcohol Spectrum
Disorder (FASD) Centre for Excellence............. 96
• Office of the Attorney General............................ 96
• Prescription Drug Program................................. 96
• Public Health Offices........................................... 96
• Regional Health Authorities................................ 97
• Horizon Health Network................................... 97
• Vitalité Health Network.................................... 97
• Adoptive and Foster Families............................. 97
• Breastfeeding Support........................................ 97
• Cancer Resources................................................ 97
• Child Day Care Resources.................................. 98
• Communicable Diseases..................................... 98
• Family and Early Childhood................................ 98
• Family Resource Centres.................................... 98
• Family Resource Centres for
the Military............................................................ 98
• First Nations Family Support.............................. 99
• Food Safety Resources....................................... 99
• Hearing and Speech............................................ 99
• Libraries................................................................ 99
• Literacy Resources.............................................. 99
• Multiple Birth Families......................................... 99
• Newcomer/Immigrant Families........................... 99
• Nutrition................................................................ 99
• Physical Activity................................................... 99
• Safety Resources................................................. 99
• Smoking Resources........................................... 100
• Tele-Care............................................................. 100
• Transition Houses.............................................. 100
• Women’s Services............................................. 100
92
Resources
Resources
Provincial Services
Addiction Services
Website: www.gnb.ca/0378/addiction-e.asp
• Bathurst.........................................(506) 547-2086
• Campbellton..................................(506) 789-7055
• Edmundston..................................(506) 735-2092
• Fredericton....................................(506) 452-5558
• Miramichi.......................................(506) 778-6111
• Moncton........................................(506) 856-2333
• Saint John.....................................(506) 674-4300
• Tracadie-Sheila.............................(506) 394-3615
Child Protection Services
If you have concerns about a child call your local
Social Development Regional office. See Department
of Social Development
Report abuse: 1-888-992-2873
Website: www.gnb.ca/children Click on “Be Vigilant,
Report Child Abuse Booklet”
Department of Education and Early
Childhood Development
You’ll find information and resources for Education
and Early Childhood Development in New Brunswick.
Website: www.gnb.ca\education
• Anglophone School District North
..................................................... 1-888-623-6363
• Anglophone School District East
..................................................... 1-888-746-1333
• Anglophone School District South
..................................................... 1-877-492-8255
• Anglophone School District West:
• Fredericton................................ 1-877-691-8800
• Woodstock................................ 1-866-423-8800
• District scolaire francophone nord-ouest
......................................................(506) 739-2863
• District scolaire francophone nord-est:
• Restigouche...............................(506) 789-2014
• Chaleur......................................(506) 544-2492
• Péninsule...................................(506) 394-3220
• District scolaire francophone sud
..................................................... 1-877-869-2040
Department of Health
You’ll find information and resources for health in New
Brunswick.
Website: www.gnb.ca/health
Talk With Me:
An Early Language Service that offers free information
and training to parents, community partners and the
general public. It helps prevent communication and
learning difficulties for all children from birth to 5 years
of age.
To find out more on the programs and services in your
area, contact your local school district:
94
Support and Information Contacts
Website: www.gnb.ca\socialdevelopment
You can connect with Social Development Regional
Offices through this website.
Social Development Regional Offices:
• Acadian Peninsula....................... 1-866-441-4149
• Chaleur......................................... 1-866-441-4341
• Pabineau First Nation Health Centre
......................................................(506) 547-4204
• Redbank Metepenagiag Health Centre
......................................................(506) 836-6120
• St.Mary’s Medical Clinic, Fredericton
......................................................(506) 452-2750
• Tobique wellness Centre..............(506) 273-5430
• Edmundston................................. 1-866-441-4249
• Woodstock First Nation Health Centre
......................................................(506) 325-3570
• Miramichi...................................... 1-866-441-4246
Healthy Environments
• Fredericton................................... 1-866-444-8838
• Moncton....................................... 1-866-426-5191
• Restigouche................................. 1-866-441-4245
• Saint John.................................... 1-866-441-4340
Wellness: For information about program and services
in your community. Website: http://www2.gnb.ca/
content/gnb/en/departments/social_development/
wellness.html
First Nation Community Health Centres
There are Community Health Centres on all First
Nations reserves in New Brunswick.
• Elsipogtog Health and Wellness Centre
......................................................(506) 523-8227
• Bouctouche First Nation Health Centre
......................................................(506) 743-2537
• Burnt Church Wellness Centre
......................................................(506) 776-1246
You’ll find information and resources for health
protection in New Brunswick
Website: www.gnb.ca/publichealth
Regional Health Protection Branch Offices:
Bathurst........................................ (506) 549-5550
Fredericton.................................... (506) 453-2830
Moncton........................................ (506) 856-2814
Saint John..................................... (506) 658-3022
Healthy Smiles, Clear Vision
The Department of Social Development manages the
Dental and Vision Program.
Website: www.gnb.ca/children Click on “Healthy
Smiles, Clear Vision”
Mental Health Centres
Website: www.gnb.ca/0055/mental-health-e.asp
• Eel Ground Health Centre.............(506) 627-4693
• Bathurst.........................................(506) 547-2110
• Fort Folly First Nation Health........(506) 379-3400
• Caraquet.......................................(506) 726-2030
• Kingsclear First Nation Health Centre
......................................................(506) 363-4001
• Fredericton....................................(506) 453-2132
• Eel River Bar Health Centre.........(506) 684-6297
• Campbellton..................................(506) 789-2440
• Indian Island First Nation .............(506) 523-9795
• Edmundston..................................(506) 735-2070
• Madawaska Maliseet First Nation Health
......................................................(506) 735-0676
• Oromocto Wel-A-Mook-Took Health Centre
......................................................(506) 357-1027
Support and information contacts
Department of Social Development
• Grand Falls....................................(506) 475-2440
• Grand Manan................................(506) 662-7023
• Kedgwick.......................................(506) 284-3431
• Miramichi.......................................(506) 778-6111
Support and Information Contacts
95
• Moncton (Horizon).........................(506) 856-2444
• Moncton (Vitalité)..........................(506) 862-4144
• Perth-Andover...............................(506) 273-4701
• Richibucto.....................................(506) 523-7620
• Sackville........................................(506) 856-2444
• Saint John.....................................(506) 658-3737
Check this website for basic information about family
law in New Brunswick.
Website: http://www2.gnb.ca/content/gnb/en/
departments/attorney_general/services.html
• Shediac.........................................(506) 533-2816
Prescription Drug Program
• St. George.....................................(506) 755-4044
For information about which drugs are covered:
Phone: 1-800-332-3692
• Sussex..........................................(506) 432-2090
Public Health Offices
• Shippagan.....................................(506) 336-3367
• St. Stephen...................................(506) 466-7380
• Tracadie-Sheila.............................(506) 394-3760
• Woodstock....................................(506) 325-4419
New Brunswick Courts
The New Brunswick Courts website provides
information for matters related to family court.
Website: www.gnb.ca/cour
New Brunswick’s Family Law Information
Centre
This website offers general information and resources
about family law in New Brunswick such as child
custody and access. If you have questions about how
the courts work, court rules, and court procedures,
you can call the toll-free Family Law Information Line.
Phone: 1-888-236-2444
Website: www.familylawnb.ca
New Brunswick Fetal Alcohol Spectrum
Disorder (FASD) Centre of Excellence
(506) 869-2147
96
Office of the Attorney General
Website: www.gnb.ca/0051/0212/index-e.asp
Website: www.gnb.ca/publichealth
• Bathurst.........................................(506) 547-2062
• Blackville.......................................(506) 843-2956
• Boiestown......................................(506) 453-5200
• Campbellton..................................(506) 789-2266
• Caraquet.......................................(506) 726-2025
• Chipman........................................(506) 453-5200
• Dalhousie......................................(506) 789-2266
• Edmundston..................................(506) 735-2065
• Fredericton....................................(506) 453-5200
• Grand Falls....................................(506) 475-2441
• Grand Manan................................(506) 662-7024
......................................................(506) 755-4022
• Kedgwick.......................................(506) 284-3422
• Miramichi.......................................(506) 778-6102
• Moncton........................................(506) 856-2401
• Neguac..........................................(506) 776-3824
• Oromocto......................................(506) 453-5200
• Perth-Andover.............................. 1-888-829-6444
• Plaster Rock................................. 1-888-829-6444
• Richibucto.....................................(506) 523-7607
• Sackville........................................(506) 364-4080
• Saint John.....................................(506) 658-2454
• Shediac.........................................(506) 533-3354
• Shippagan.....................................(506) 336-3061
Support and Information Contacts
Regional Health Authorities
The Regional Health Authorities are good sources of
information about local programs and services.
Horizon Health Network
Website: http://www.horizonnb.ca/
Phone: (506) 623-5500
Toll-Free: 1-888-820-5444
Phone: (506) 542-2344
Fredericton Region Autism Intervention Services
Phone: (506) 455-7048
Moncton/Sussex/Kent
Autism Consultants NB Inc.
Phone: (506) 386-2262
Nackawic to Perth-Andover/Plaster
Rock River Valley Intervention Group
Phone: (506) 392-6458
Northwestern NB including Edmundston/Grand Falls/
Saint-Quentin/Kedgwick
Sylvie-Line Michaud
Phone: (506) 733-1691
Saint John Region, St. Stephen & Fundy Isles
Stepping Stones Fundy Region Inc.
Phone: (506) 693-9858
Vitalité Health Network
Website: www.vitalitenb.ca/en
Phone: (506) 544-2133
Toll-Free: 1-888-472-2220
Support and information contacts
• St. George.....................................(506) 755-4022
• St. Stephen...................................(506) 466-7504
..................................................... 1-888-476-3555
• Sussex......................................... 1-800-545-8008
......................................................(506) 432-2003
• Tracadie-Sheila.............................(506) 394-3888
• Woodstock................................... 1-888-829-6444
Breastfeeding Support
Other Resources
and Services
Adoptive and Foster Families
Adoptive parents can contact a local Social
Development office for support and advice. You’ll find
contact information at: Website: www.gnb.ca/children
Adoption Council of Canada
Website: www.adoption.ca; 1-888-542-3678 (Toll free)
New Brunswick Adoption Foundation
Website: www.nbadoption.ca
Phone: (506) 832-0676
Autism Agencies
For information about Autism Agencies call the
agency nearest you.
For information on breastfeeding:
Website: www.gnb.ca/publichealth Click on “Healthy
People” and then Click on “Baby Friendly Initiative and
Breastfeeding.”
www.facebook.com/breastfeedingnb.allaitementnb
Information about pregnancy and breastfeeding
www.nb.unvanl.ca
La Leche League Canada
Website: www.lllc.ca
French: http://www.allaitement.ca/
Cancer Resources
Cancer Information Service
Phone: 1-888-939-3333 (Toll free)
(Monday to Friday, 9am to 6pm)
Canadian Cancer Society
Website: www.cancer.ca
New Brunswick Cancer Network
Website: www.gnb.ca/0051/cancer/index-e.asp
Campbellton/Acadian Peninsula/Bathurst /Miramichi
Bay Chaleur
Autism Behavioral Intervention Center Inc.
Support and Information Contacts
97
Child Day Care Services
You can find information about childcare in your
community through the Department of Education and
Early Childhood Development
Website: http://www.gnb.ca/0000/ELCC.asp
Early Childhood Care and Education New Brunswick:
(506) 454-4765 Toll free: 1-888-834-7070
Communicable Diseases
For information on Communicable Diseases:
Website: www.gnb.ca/publichealth
Click on “Diseases and Conditions A-Z”
Family and Early Childhood
For information on the services offered by Family and
Early Childhood call the agency in your school district.
Anglophone School District South:
Family and Early Childhood South: 1-855-383-5437
Anglophone School District West:
Family and Early Childhood West: 1-855-454-3762
Anglophone School District North:
Family and Early Childhood North: 1-855-778-6532
Anglophone School District East:
Family and Early Childhood East: 1-855-238-3694
District scolaire francophone Nord-Est :
Famille et petite enfance Nord-Est: 1-855-993-0993
98
Family Resource Centres
Website: www.frc-crf.com/
• Acadian Peninsula Family Resource Centre,
Caraquet.......................................(506) 727-1860
• Care N’ Share Family Resource Centre Inc.,
Chipman........................................(506) 339-6726
• Chaleur Resource Centre for Parents
Bathurst.........................................(506) 545-6608
• Family Resource Centre of Charlotte County, St
Stephen.........................................(506) 465-8181
• Family Resource Centre, Saint John
......................................................(506) 633-2182
• Fredericton Regional Family Resource Centre
......................................................(506) 474-0252
• Childhood Family Resource Centre of
Westmorland-Albert
......................................................(506) 384-7874
• Kent Family Resource Centre, Richibucto
......................................................(506) 524-9192
• Kings County Family Resource Centre, Sussex
......................................................(506) 433-2349
• Madawaska Victoria Family Resource Centre,
Grand Falls....................................(506) 473-6351
• Restigouche Resource Centre for Parents,
Campbellton..................................(506) 753-4172
• Northumberland County Family Resource Centre,
Miramichi.......................................(506) 622-5103
District scolaire francophone Nord-Ouest :
Famille et petite enfance Nord-Ouest: 1-855-480-4060
• Valley Family Resource Centre, Woodstock
......................................................(506) 325-2299
District scolaire francophone Sud :
Famille et petite enfance Francophone Sud:
1-855-840-6269
Family Resource Centres for the Military
Gagetown Military Family Resource Centre
Phone: (506) 422-3352 / 1-800-866-4546
Support and Information Contacts
NB Aboriginal Peoples Council........ (506) 458-8422
Multiple Birth Families
Fredericton Native Friendship Centre.(506) 459-5283
Moncton
Website: www.monctonmultiples.com
Phone: (506) 204-2203
Skigin Elnoog Housing................... (506) 459-7161
Fredericton
Fredericton Area Moms of Multiples
Website: www.multiplebirthscanada.org/~fredericton
Phone: (506) 455-8365
Gignoo Transition House................ (506) 458-1236
................. and 24 hour Crisis Line 1-800-565-6878
Under One Sky Daycare................. (506) 458-9269
Food Safety Resources
FightBac offers information on handling and storing
food safely.
Website: www.canfightbac.org/en/
Health Canada offers information about food safety.
www.healthycanadians.gc.ca/eating-nutrition/safetysalubrite/index-eng.php
Health Canada offers more information about mercury
levels in fish.
Website: www.hc-sc.gc.ca/fn-an/securit/chem-chim/
environ/mercur/cons-adv-etud-eng.php
Hearing and Speech
New Brunswick Audiology departments are located in
your local hospital.
Libraries
NB Public Library Service
Website: www.gnb.ca/libraries
Website: www.bienvenuenb.ca
Click on “Immigrating and Settling.”
New Brunswick Multicultural Council
Website: www.nb-mc.ca/
Phone: (506) 453-1091
Nutrition
For information on reading Nutrition Facts labels
Website: www.healthycanadians.gc.ca/dailyvalue
Physical Activity
Active for Life
Website: www.activeforlife.com
Safety Resources
Literacy Resources
Literacy Coalition of NB (LCNB)
Website: www.nbliteracy.ca
Phone: (506) 457-1227, 1-800-563-2211
Conseil pour le développement de l’alphabétisme et
des compétences des adultes du Nouveau-Brunswick
(CODACNB)
Website : www.codacnb.ca
Phone : 1 866 473-4404
Born to Read program
Website: www.borntoreadnb.com
Newcomer/Immigrant Families
Support and information contacts
First Nations Family Support
Canadian Red Cross Society, NB
Website: www.redcross.ca
Phone: (506) 674-6200
Child Safety Link
Website: www.childsafetylink.ca
Phone: 1-866-288-1388
Consumer Product Safety (Health Canada)
Website: www.healthycanadians.gc.ca/index-eng.php
Click on “Consumer products”.
Phone: 1-866-662-0666
Health Canada
For more information about lead-based paint
Website: www.canada.ca/en/health-canada/services/
home-safety/lead-based-paint.htm
Support and Information Contacts
99
Kids’ Help Line
Website: www.kidshelpphone.ca
Phone: 1-800-668-6868
• Bathurst, Maison de Passage House
......................................................(506) 546-9540
• Campbellton, Maison Notre Dame,
......................................................(506) 753-4703
Parachute
www.parachutecanada.org
Phone: 1-888-537-7777
St. John Ambulance
Website: www.sja.ca Select “New Brunswick.”
Phone: 1-800-563-9998
Transport Canada
For car seat safety information.
Website: www.tc.gc.ca/roadsafety
Click on “Child Safety.”
Phone: 1-800-333-0371
Smoking Resources
Website: www.smokershelpline.ca
Phone: 1-877-513-5333
New Brunswick Anti-Tobacco Coalition
Website: www.nbatc.ca
Phone: (506) 832-3857
Health Canada
Website: http://www.hc-sc.gc.ca/hc-ps/tobac-tabac/
index-eng.php
Tele-Care is a free, bilingual, and confidential
telephone service for non-urgent health concerns.
Available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
Website: www.gnb.ca/health Click on “Tele-Care 811”
Phone: 811
You can find information about transition houses
on the NB website or contact your local Social
Development office.
Website:
www.gnb.ca/0012/violence/PDF/Freeshelter.pdf
100
• Fredericton, Gignoo Transition House,
.............. (506) 458-1236; 1-800-565-6878 (crisis)
• Fredericton, Liberty Lane Inc., (506) 451-2120
.................................... (506) 458-9774 (outreach)
• Fredericton, Women in Transition House Inc.
......................................................(506) 459-2300
• Miramichi Emergency Centre for Women Inc.
......................................................(506) 622-8865
• Moncton, Crossroads for Women
............... (506) 857-4184; (506) 853-0811 (crisis)
• Saint John, Hestia House Inc., (506) 634-7571
.......................................... (506) 634-7570 (crisis)
• Saint John, Second Stage Housing Inc.
......................................................(506) 632-9289
• Ste-Anne-de-Kent, Maison Sérénité/Serenity House 506-743-1530
• St. Stephen, Fundy Region Transition House
......................................................(506) 466-4590
• Sussex Vale Transition House.......... (506) 433-1649
.......................................... (506) 432-6999 (crisis)
Tele-Care
Transition Houses
• Edmundston, Escale Madavic,...............................
......................................................(506) 739-6265
• Tracadie-Sheila, Accueil Ste-Famille
......................................................(506) 395-1500
• Woodstock Sanctuary House.......... (506) 325-9452
Women’s Services
Executive Council Office: Women’s Equality
Website: www2.gnb.ca/content/gnb/en/departments/
women/Violence_Prevention_and_Community_
Partnerships.html
Select: “End intimate partner violence”
Support and Information Contacts
Support and information contacts
Support and Information Contacts
101
102
103
104
105
106
107
Be Safe
Soyez en sécurité
post card 5 x 7 full color.indd 1
04/4/08 11:43:43 AM
Car seats and booster
Rear-facing seat
Use a rear-facing seat
until a baby is at least
one year old
and 10 kg (22 lbs).
seats protect child
ren. Use this chart
Forward-facing seat
Use from 10 kg (22
lbs)
to 18 kg (40 lbs),
from at least age one
to
generally four and
a half years.
to find the right seat
for your child.
Booster seat
Use from 18 kg (40
lbs)
until the child meet
s one of
the following criter
ia:
• 9 years old
• 36 kg (79-80 lbs)
• 145 cm (4’9”)
Seatbelt
To be used when a
child
has outgrown the boost
er seat
or meets one of the
criteria listed in the
preceding column.
Les sièges d’au
Utilisez le tableau to et les sièges d’appoint protègen
suivant pour trouver
t les enfants.
le siège qui convient
Siège d’enfant orien
à votre enfant.
té
Siège de bébé orien
vers l’arrière té
Pour bébé naissant
jusqu’à l’âge
d’au moins un an
et 10 kg (22 lbs).
post card 5 x
7 full color.indd
vers l’avant
Pour enfant de 10 à
18 kg
(22 à 40 lbs), à partir
d’au moin
un an jusqu’à généralem s
ent
quatre ans et demi.
Siège d’appoint
Pour enfant de 18 kg
(40 lbs)
jusqu’à ce qu’il répon
de à l’un
des trois critères suiva
nts :
• est âgé de 9 ans;
• pèse 36 kg (de 79
à 80 lbs)
• mesure 145 cm (4
pi 9 po)
Adapted with permis
sion from
Adapté avec la permis
sion de
2
Ceinture de sécurité
Une fois que l’enfant
est
devenu trop grand
pour
siège d’appoint et qu’il le
répon
à un des critères énum d
érés
dans la colonne précé
dente.
CNB 5191
04/4/08 11:43
:45 AM
Car seats and booster seats protect children. Use this chart to find the right seat for your child.
Rear-facing seat
Forward-facing seat
Booster seat
Seatbelt
Use a rear-facing seat
until a baby is at least
one year old
and 10 kg (22 lbs).
Use from 10 kg (22 lbs)
to 18 kg (40 lbs),
from at least age one to
generally four and a half years.
Use from 18 kg (40 lbs)
until the child meets one of
the following criteria:
• 9 years old
• 36 kg (79-80 lbs)
• 145 cm (4’9”)
To be used when a child
has outgrown the booster seat
or meets one of the
criteria listed in the
preceding column.
Les sièges d’auto et les sièges d’appoint protègent les enfants.
Utilisez le tableau suivant pour trouver le siège qui convient à votre enfant.
Siège de bébé orienté
vers l’arrière
Siège d’enfant orienté
vers l’avant
Pour bébé naissant
jusqu’à l’âge
d’au moins un an
et 10 kg (22 lbs).
Pour enfant de 10 à 18 kg
(22 à 40 lbs), à partir d’au moins
un an jusqu’à généralement
quatre ans et demi.
Ceinture de sécurité
Siège d’appoint
Pour enfant de 18 kg (40 lbs)
jusqu’à ce qu’il réponde à l’un
des trois critères suivants :
• est âgé de 9 ans;
• pèse 36 kg (de 79 à 80 lbs)
• mesure 145 cm (4 pi 9 po)
Adapted with permission from
Adapté avec la permission de
post card 5 x 7 full color.indd 2
Une fois que l’enfant est
devenu trop grand pour le
siège d’appoint et qu’il répond
à un des critères énumérés
dans la colonne précédente.
CNB 5191
04/4/08 11:43:45 AM
Be Safe
Soyez en sécurité
post card 5 x
7 full color.indd
1
04/4/08 11:43
:43 AM
Keep Kids Safe
A Parent’s Guide to Car Seats
Choosing and using the right car seat.
110
!
For saFety’s sake…
This booklet tells you how to install and use car seats in your own car, van, truck or SUV.
Please keep in mind that your child should be in a properly installed car seat whenever he or she rides in
ANY car.
This includes riding in taxis or in grandparents’ or babysitters’ cars.
Please note: When we use the word “car” in this booklet, it includes cars, vans, trucks and SUVs.
Choosing and Using the Right Car Seat
C
ar crashes kill and injure more children than any other cause.
When you use the right car seat in the right way, you can reduce
the risk that your child will be hurt or killed by 70%. Car seats and booster
seats save lives.
For a car seat to protect your child, you must:
l Use a car seat that meets Transport Canada’s safety regulations.
A safe seat will have the mark shown to the right.
l If you are using an old or used car seat, check to be sure:
– has never been in a crash
– is not older than the manufacturer’s expiry date
– if there is no expiry date stamped in the plastic, call the
manufacturer. Most seats can be used for six years.
l Choose the seat that is right for your child’s age and size.
l Put the seat in your car the right way.
l Harness your child in the seat correctly every time.
Once you’ve chosen the right car seat for your child’s age and size,
you can use the checklists in this booklet to be sure that:
• Youputtheseatinyourcartherightway.
• Youharnessyourchildintotheseatcorrectly.
The kind of seat children need changes as they grow. Don’t be in a rush to
move your children from one kind of seat to another. Make sure that they
are old enough and big enough to be safe in the new seat.
Look for this safety mark
For
saFety’s
sake…
!
Never ride with a baby
or child in your arms or
on your lap.
Never leave a child
alone in a car.
Objects in the car can fly
around and injure people
during a crash or sudden
stop. Be sure everything
in your car is strapped
down or stored in the
trunk.
1
Contents
The Safest Spot in Your Car ....................
4
Types of Car Seats ......................................
6
Rear-Facing Infant Seat ............................
8
Babies need a Rear-Facing Infant Seat from birth until they are
AT LEAST 1 year old and weigh AT LEAST 10 kg (22 pounds).
Some seats can be used rear-facing until your baby weighs
18 kg (40 pounds).
Forward-Facing Child Seat ........................
Babies must be at least 1 year old, weigh more than
10kg (22 pounds) and should be walking on their own before they
move to a forward-facing seat. They must continue to use this
seat until they weigh 18 kg (40 pounds). Some forward facing car
seats can be used with harness straps until your child weighs
up to 30 kg (65 pounds).
2
12
Booster Seat .................................................
Children must weigh at least 18 kg (40 pounds) to move to
a booster seat. A child should also be at least 4 years old.
It’s safest if children use a booster seat until they are
145 cm (4 ft. 9 in.) tall.
Seat Belt ..........................................................
Children are ready for a seat belt when they are AT LEAST
145 cm (4 ft. 9 in.) tall. They must be tall enough for their legs to
bend over the edge of the seat while they are sitting up straight.
To Find Out More .........................................
!
16
18
20
For saFety’s sake…
When you buy a car seat:
• Read and follow the directions that come with your car seat. Every brand of car seat is
a little different. Each will come with an instruction booklet.
• Send in the registration card when you buy a car seat. If you do this, the manufacturer can
let you know if there are any recalls or problems with the seat.
• Check with Transport Canada to see if there are any recalls on the seat you plan to use.
You’ll find contact information for Transport Canada on page 20.
3
The Safest Spot in Your Car
T
he best spot for your child is in the back seat of your car. Even when
your child no longer needs a car or booster seat, your children are
safest in the back seat until they are 13.
If your car will allow it, the middle of the back seat is the safest place.
The side positions are safe too. In many you can only use the Universal
Anchorage System (page 13) in the side positions. Do not place a rearfacing seat in front of an armrest that folds down.
4
If you must place your child’s car seat next to a door, remove all toys,
blankets, pillows or other things from the space between the car seat and
the door. These could hurt your child if the side airbag inflates.
If you don’t have a back seat…
It is never safe to install a forward-facing car seat in the front seat if there
is no tether anchor for the car seat.
Airbags are dangerous for children.
• Itisnever safe to put a rear-facing infant seat in a seat with an active
front air bag.
• Ifyoumustputyourchildinthefrontseat,turnofftheairbag.
Remove all toys, blankets,
pillows or other things from the
space between the car seat and
the door.
To find out if it’s okay to use a car seat in the front seat of your car:
• Checkyourowner’smanual
• Callyourcar’smanufacturer
• CallTransportCanada(You’llfindcontactinformationforTransport
Canada on page 20.)
5
Types of Car Seats
Infant Seats
Babies need a rear-facing Infant Seat from birth until they are at least 1 year old and weigh at least
10 kg (22 pounds).
Many convertible car seats can be used rear-facing until your child weighs 118 kg (40 pounds).
Check the label on your seat.
Rear-facing infant car seat
6
Rear-facing convertible car seat
Child Seats
Booster Seats
Babies must be at least 1 year old and weigh more
than 10kg (22 pounds) before they can move to
a forward-facing seat. It is safer to keep your baby
in a rear-facing convertible seat longer.
Children must weigh at least 18 kg (40 pounds) to
move to a booster seat. A child should also be at
least 4 years old. They must use a booster seat until
they are 9 years old or 145 cm (4 ft. 9 in.) tall. If you
use a backless booster, make sure the seat in your
car is tall enough to protect your child’s head.
Forward-facing convertible car seat
High-back booster seat
Backless booster seat
7
Using a Rear-Facing Infant Car Seat
Rear-facing infant car seat
Rear-facing convertible car seat
8
B
abies need a rear-facing infant seat from birth until they are at least
1 year old and weigh at least 10 kg (22 pounds). Rear-facing car
seats provide the best protection for your baby’s head and neck. Keep your
baby rear-facing until your baby is walking on their own, and your baby
is older and heavier. Many babies use an infant seat with a handle when
they are born, and then move to a convertible seat later. Your baby can sit
rear-facing in a convertible seat until they reach the weight limit or height
limit printed on the label on the seat. Many seats can be used in the rearfacing position until your baby weighs 18 kg (40 pounds). Check the label
on your seat. It is okay for your baby’s legs to touch the back of the car.
Rear-facing seats need to be tilted back at an angle of a maximum of
45 degrees to keep your baby’s head lying back. Check your car seat manual
to learn how to do this.
1. Put the seat in your car
Cars built after September 2002 have a Universal Anchorage
System (UAS/LATCH). If you are using this system:
l Check the Owner’s Manual to see how to use the UAS/LATCH system in
your car. In most cars you cannot use the UAS in the middle seat. Use
the seatbelt instead.
l Connect the infant car seat to the UAS/LATCH anchors in the car.
Rear-facing infant seat with
a base
l Pull the UAS/LATCH belt tight. The seat should not be able to slide side
to side more than 2.5 cm (1 inch). If the top of the seat moves, that is
normal.
If you are using a UAS/LATCH system do not also use the regular
seat belt.
UAS/LATCH
If you are using a lap belt to hold the car
seat:
l Check the Owner’s Manual to find out
how to use a seat belt with an infant car
seat in your car.
l Put the seat belt through the marked
pathway on the infant car seat or base.
You’ll find the correct pathway in your car
seat instruction booklet. Buckle the seat
belt.
Rear-facing infant seat
without a base
l Push down on the infant car seat or base and pull seat belt tight.
Push hard. Use your knee.
Push hard. Use your hand or
knee.
l Test the seatbelt to be sure it stays tight. If the seat belt loosens,
tighten it again, unbuckle the seat belt, flip the buckle over and buckle
it again. The car seat should not be able to slide side to side more than
2.5 cm (1 inch). If the top of the seat moves, that is normal.
If you are using a regular seat belt do not also use the UAS/LATCH system.
Locking clip
9
How to use a locking clip
Squeeze and feed through first
slot.
Squeeze and feed through
second slot.
Locking clip lies flat and should
look like the photo.
If you are using a lap and shoulder belt to hold the car seat:
l Check the Owner’s Manual to find out how to use a seat belt with
an infant car seat in your car.
l Put the seat belt through the marked pathway on the infant car seat
or base and buckle it. You’ll find the correct pathway in your car seat
instruction booklet. Buckle the seat belt.
Push hard. Use your knee.
Sometimes a tight
shoulder belt can tilt the
infant seat to the side.
If this happens, leave
the shoulder belt
loose. Use a locking
clip to lock the lap and
shoulder belt in place.
10
l Pull the shoulder belt all the way out. You’ll hear it click when it reaches
the end. Let go of it. As the belt shortens, push down on the infant
car seat or base. Push hard. At the same time, pull up on the shoulder
belt so that it will lock in place as tightly as possible. Not all seatbelts
lock. When you pull your seatbelt all the way out and let it go, it should
shorten, but not lengthen again. If it can be pulled out, it doesn’t lock.
If your car’s seatbelts don’t lock, you’ll need to use a locking clip to
keep the car seat in place.
l Test the seat belt to be sure it stays tight. If the seat belt loosens, use
a locking clip. The car seat should not be able to slide side to side more
than 2.5 cm (1 inch). If the top of the seat moves, that is normal.
If you are using a regular seat belt do not also use the UAS/LATCH system.
2. Put your baby in the seat
l The shoulder harness is threaded in the infant car seat as shown in
the instructions. Choose the slot that is level with or slightly below your
baby’s shoulders.
l The chest clip is level with your baby’s armpits.
l The shoulder harness stays on the baby’s shoulders.
l The harness is snug. You can fit only 1 finger under the harness on
your baby’s chest.
One finger under the harness
l The harness stays snug when you pull on it.
l Do not use bunting bags or head-huggers that did not come with the
seat. They may not be safe.
!
For saFety’s sake…..
Check the instructions to see where the handle of your seat
should be when it is in the car. On some seats, the handle
must be pushed back. On other seats the handle must remain
up. Some handles must be in the rebound position near your
baby’s feet.
If your infant seat has a canopy, check your instruction booklet.
Some canopies must be down when the seat is used in a car.
(Adapted from Take the Infant Car Seat YES Test, Calgary Health Region)
11
Using a Forward-Facing Child Car Seat
B
abies must be at least 1 year old, and weigh more than 10kg
(22 pounds) before they move to a forward-facing seat. There is no
rush. It is safer to keep your baby in a rear-facing convertible seat until your
baby is walking on their own, and your baby is older and heavier. Some
convertible seats can be used rear-facing until your baby weighs 18 kg
(40 pounds). It is okay if your baby’s feet are touching the back of the car.
When your baby moves to a forward-facing seat, they must continue to use
this seat until they weigh 18 kg (40 pounds). Some forward facing car seats
can be used with harness straps until your child weighs 30 kg (65 pounds).
12
Before you install the car seat
Put your child in the car seat to see how the harness straps fit. The harness
straps should come out of a slot that is level with or a little above your
child’s shoulders. Your car seat manual will show you how to adjust the
harness straps.
1. Put the seat in your car
Cars built after September 2002 have a Universal Anchorage
System (UAS/LATCH). If you are using this system:
l Check the Owner’s Manual to see how to
use the UAS/LATCH system in your car. In
most cars you cannot use the UAS in the
middle seat. Use the seatbelt instead.
l Connect the car seat to the UAS/LATCH
anchors in the car.
UAS/LATCH
l Pull the UAS/LATCH belt tight. The seat should not be able to slide side
to side more than 2.5 cm (1 inch).
Forward-facing child seat
l Hook the tether strap on the car seat to the tether anchor in the car.
Be sure the tether strap is tight. If you don’t see a tether anchor, your
owner’s manual will show you where it is.
If you are using a UAS/LATCH system do not also use the regular seat belt.
If you are using a lap belt to hold the car seat:
l Check the Owner’s Manual to find out how to use a seat belt with
a front-facing car seat in your car.
l Put the seat belt through the marked pathway on the car seat.
You’ll find the correct pathway in your car seat instruction booklet.
Buckle the seat belt.
l Push down on the car seat or base and pull seat belt tight. Push hard.
l Test the seatbelt to be sure it stays tight. If the seat belt loosens,
tighten it again, unbuckle the seat belt, flip the buckle over and buckle
it again. The car seat should not be able to slide side to side more than
2.5 cm (1 inch).
Push down on seat and pull tight
on belt
13
l Hook the tether strap on the car seat to the tether anchor in the car.
Be sure the tether strap is tight. If you don’t see a tether anchor, your
owner’s manual will show you where it is. If your car has no anchor,
a mechanic may be able to install one.
If you are using a regular seat belt do not also use the UAS/LATCH system.
Tether anchor
If you are using a lap and shoulder belt to hold the car seat:
l Check the Owner’s Manual to find out how to use a seat belt with
a forward-facing car seat in your car.
l Put the seat belt through the marked pathway on the car seat or base
and buckle it. You’ll find the correct pathway in your car seat instruction
booklet. Buckle the seat belt.
Push hard. Use your knee.
l Pull the shoulder belt all the way out. You’ll hear it click when it reaches
the end. Let go of it. As the belt shortens, push down on the car seat.
Push hard. At the same time, pull up on the shoulder belt so that it will
lock in place as tightly as possible. Not all seatbelts lock. When you
pull your seatbelt all the way out and let it go, it should shorten, but
not lengthen again. If it can be pulled out, it doesn’t lock. If your car’s
seatbelts don’t lock, you’ll need to use a locking clip to keep the car
seat in place. See How to use a locking clip on page 10.
l Test the seat belt to be sure it stays tight. If the seat belt loosens, use
a locking clip. The car seat should not be able to slide side to side more
than 2.5 cm (1 inch).
l Hook the tether strap on the car seat to the tether anchor in the car.
Be sure the tether strap is tight. If you don’t see a tether anchor, your
owner’s manual will show you where it is. If your car has no anchor,
a mechanic may be able to install one.
Locking clip
14
If you are using a regular seat belt do not also use the UAS/LATCH system.
2. Put your child in the seat
l The shoulder harness is threaded in the car seat as shown in the
instructions. The straps should be level with or just above your child’s
shoulders.
l The chest clip is level with your child’s armpits.
l The shoulder harness stays on the child’s shoulders.
One finger under the harness
l The harness is snug. You can fit only 1 finger under the harness at your
child’s collarbone.
l The harness stays snug when you pull on it.
(Adapted from Take the Child Car Seat YES Test, Calgary Health Region)
15
Using a Booster Seat
For
saFety’s
sake…
!
When the booster seat
is empty, buckle it in
place or take it out
of your car. A loose
booster seat can
bounce around in a
sudden stop or a crash.
C
hildren can move to a booster seat when they weigh 18 kg
(40 pounds). However, there is no rush. It is best to wait until your
child is 4 years old or more. Some car seats can be used with harness
straps until your child weighs 30 kg (65 pounds). The law says that
children must use a booster until they are 9 years old or 145 cm
(4 ft. 9 in.) tall. It’s safest if children stay in the booster seat until they
are 145 cm (4 ft. 9 in.) tall, even if they are older than 9. You need to get
a booster seat with a higher weight limit if your child weighs more than the
weight limit for your booster seat, but is less that 145 cm (4 ft. 9 in.) tall.
16
Adult seat belts are too big for a child’s small body. Booster seats lift
children up so that the seat belt fits safely over their body. As well, a child
in a booster seat can see out the windows and is happier riding in the car.
Booster Seats can only be used if your car has lap-shoulder belts.
There are two kinds of Booster Seats:
• High Back: These seats support the child’s head in cars with
low-backed seats. Some high back boosters can only be used in tall
vehicle seats.
• Backless: These have just a seat. They are safe in cars with high-back
seats.
Children should use a booster seat until the middle of their ears is above
the top of the car’s seat or the back of the high-back booster seat. If the
child is leass than 145 cm (4 ft. 9 in.) tall they may need a different booster
seat with a higher back.
High back booster seat
1. Put the seat in your car:
l Check the Owner’s Manual to find out how to use a booster seat in
your car.
l Follow the instructions that come with your booster seat.
l Put the booster seat in the back seat of your car.
2. Put your child in the seat
Backless booster seat
l The shoulder belt crosses the middle of your child’s chest. Your child
could be hurt or killed if the shoulder belt is behind the child’s back or
under the arm.
l The lap belt is low and snug over the hips.
(Adapted from Take the Booster Seat YES Test, Calgary Health Region)
17
Using Seat Belts
For
saFety’s
sake…
!
Have your children
ride in the back seat.
Even after children
have outgrown car and
booster seats, it’s safest
if they stay in the back
seat until they’re 13.
Children should be 13
before they sit in a seat
with an active front
airbag.
18
W
hen a child outgrows the height and weight limits of the booster
seat, they may be ready to use a regular seat belt. There’s no
rush to move to a regular seat belt.
145 cm
(4 ft. 9 in.)
Children are ready for a seat belt when:
l They are AT LEAST 145 cm (4 ft. 9 in.) tall or have a seated height of
74 cm (29 in.).
l The lap belt fits low across their hips.
l The shoulder belt fits across the middle of their chest. It should NOT be
across the child’s neck, behind the back, or under the arm.
l They are tall enough for their legs to bend over the edge of the seat
while they are sitting up straight.
l They can sit with their back flat against the seat without slouching.
(Adapted from Take the Booster Seat YES Test, Calgary Health Region)
19
To Find Out More
For more information and resources on car
seat safety:
Child Safety Link, IWK Health Centre
phone: (902) 470-6496 or
1-866-288-1388 (toll free)
e-mail: [email protected]
website: www.childsafetylink.ca
The Co-operators Insurance: Buckle Up Bears
Program
website: http://www.cooperators.ca/.
Click on “About Us, Community”, then
“Buckle Up Bears”
Atlantic Car Seat Safety – find us on Facebook.
Post your questions.
For product advisories or recalls of car seats:
Website: www.tc.gc.ca
Search for “Child Restraint Notices”
phone: 1-800-333-0371 (toll free)
20
This booklet was produced by Child Safety Link in collaboration with Public Health Services and the Department of Health
and Wellness.
We’d like to thank the staff, parents and beautiful children of the Chebucto Family Centre, in Spryfield, Nova Scotia, and
Child Safety Link for posing for the pictures that illustrate this booklet.
Aussi disponible en français
March 2013
Partners in Children’s Safety
Partners in Children’s
Canada’s
Low Risk
Alcohol Drinking
Guidelines
Drinking alcohol ALWAYS has some risk. There is a way to
drink that will limit your risk of long- and short-term harm.
The Limits
Over time, even moderate drinking can increase your
risk of some chronic diseases, including high blood
pressure, depression and many forms of cancer. To
reduce your long-term health risks, follow these
guidelines:
Women: 0 to 2 drinks a day, up to 10 drinks a week
Is it OK to drink my weekly
limit on the weekend?
No.The weekly limits are designed to be just that –
a weekly limit, not a daily or weekend limit.
Even if you only drink heavily once in a while, it
increases your risk of injury and long-term health
problems.
Men: 0 to 3 drinks a day, up to 15 drinks a week
Once in a while you might have an extra drink, but it’s
important to stay within the weekly limits.
Pick a couple of non-drinking days each week.This
will help you to avoid developing a drinking habit.
Once in a while
The more alcohol you drink on any one occasion, the
more likely you are to be hurt or injured. Reduce your
short-term safety risks by limiting how much you
drink at any one time.
Pregnant? Breastfeeding?
If you are pregnant, or planning to become
pregnant, the safest choice is to drink no alcohol
at all.
If you are breastfeeding, there will be alcohol in
your breast milk after you drink. If you plan to drink
alcohol, there are things you can do to make sure
the alcohol doesn't reach your baby. For example,
you can breastfeed right before you drink alcohol so
the alcohol can leave your breast milk before your
baby’s next feed. Talk to your health care provider
about how you can continue to breastfeed.
Women: no more than 3 drinks
Men: no more than 4 drinks
Stay within your weekly limits.
When the limit is zero
Children and youth
Sometimes it isn’t safe to drink alcohol. Do not drink
when:
driving any vehicle or using machinery or tools
Children and youth should not drink before they
reach Nova Scotia’s legal age of 19. A young person’s
brain and body continue to develop into the late
teens and early 20s. Alcohol can harm mental and
physical development. It is safer to delay
drinking for as long as possible.
134
•
••
••
••
•
pregnant or planning to become pregnant
taking medicine or other drugs that interact with
alcohol
doing any kind of dangerous physical activity
living with mental or physical health problems
responsible for the safety of others
making important decisions
living with alcohol dependence.
Canada’s
Low Risk Alcohol Drinking Guidelines*
To use these guidelines…
Set limits for yourself and stick to them.
•
•
•
•
•
•
Stick to the daily and weekly limits.
Drink slowly. Have no more than 2 drinks in any 3
hours.
For every alcoholic drink, have one non-alcoholic
drink.
Eat before and while you are drinking.
To avoid developing a habit, have non-drinking
days every week.
Always consider your age, body weight and any
health problems. These might make lower limits, or
not drinking at all, a good idea.
Talk with the young people in your life
about the risks of drinking.
•-
Make sure they know that in Nova Scotia:
It is illegal to drink alcohol if they are under the
age of 19.
is illegal for anyone to buy or give alcohol to
- Itanyone
under the age of 19.
•-
Teens:
Help teenagers find ways to delay drinking
for as long as possible.
they choose to drink, they should never have
- Ifmore
than 1 – 2 drinks at a time, and never drink
•-
more than 1 – 2 times per week.
Young people in their late teens to age 24:
Pay attention to your surroundings
when drinking.
•
Your safety is affected by where, when and with
whom you drink.
Be sure they know that the brain continues to
develop into the early 20s. Because of this, they
should never exceed the daily and weekly
amounts outlined in “The Limits”.
What does “a drink” mean?
Don’t drink “for your health.”
•
Starting to drink, or increasing your drinking, will
not improve your health.
middle-aged men and women get health
- Only
benefits from drinking small amounts of
alcohol.
Any health benefits are cancelled if you drink
- more
than the recommended daily limit even
once in a while.
risk of getting some kinds of cancer
- Your
increases when you drink as little as one drink
•
341 ml
(12 oz.) bottle
of 5% beer,
cider, or
cooler
•
142 ml (5 oz.)
glass of 12%
wine
•
43 ml (1.5 oz.)
serving of
40% distilled
alcohol (rye,
gin, rum, etc.)
per day.
To find out more: www.gov.ns.ca/hpp/addictions/alcohol/
*Adapted from Canada’s Low-Risk Alcohol Drinking Guidelines (2012) with permission from the Canadian Centre on Substance Abuse.
Loving Care
Loving Care
1 to 3 Years
All four Loving Care books
can be downloaded at:
www.gnb.ca/publichealth
Loving Care is given free of charge
to all new parents in New Brunswick.
Loving Care
Parents and Families
11272 April 2017
2017
New Brunswick Department of Health
www.gnb.ca/health
Adapted and reprinted with written permission from the Province of Nova Scotia in 2017.
Aussi disponible en français
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